Jack had strolled up and down the beach for almost an hour, the events of the day still replaying in his mind. He was thinking about Audrey in particular, wondering whether he had made the right decision to leave her. All he could hear was Heller's voice telling him he was cursed, and while he unfortunately couldn't help but agree, he acknowledged his self-loathing shouldn't stop him from being there for Audrey. He'd gone in circles like this for hours. Was he pushing Audrey away because she deserved better than him? Or because he'd let Heller convince him that was what was best? Now, the sun had risen, and a few joggers were making their way down to the shore. He wasn't quite in solitude anymore, which was probably a sign to stop ruminating. Jack realised that finding a place to live and working through the necessary paperwork so he wasn't legally dead anymore was his biggest priority right now.
He froze as a voice called his name. It was solemn but firm even above the whipping coastal winds. It snapped Jack out of his thinking completely, in an almost jarring way, which made Jack realise it was more than a little familiar.
Turning, he found himself staring at Tony. His presence was the last thing he expected, but he sidelined his shock as he noticed that this wasn't just a cordial visit. He appeared to have lost some weight and was quite fatigued. He'd gotten some of the stubble back and didn't look like he'd been taking very good care of himself. But the seriousness in Tony's eyes begged Jack to listen, like every last bit of determination and strength was being concentrated into his gaze.
“You’re alive.” Jack breathed.
“I need your help.”
There was something so grave in Tony’s expression, and somehow, Jack knew whatever it was was serious enough to take precedence over the hows and whys of him not being dead. He recognised it as anger and determination, not lament. And Jack had known Tony for long enough that only one person in this world could take complete hold of his composure like this. It meant, perhaps, that she wasn’t dead, either. She was…
“Who has her?”
“Associates of Charles Logan.” Tony spat, voice laced with disgust. “They took her from our house and forced her into a coma. Then they took me after Henderson tried to kill me. He 'missed the artery on purpose', apparently. It was all a scheme so they could get information from us. I escaped. I tried to investigate, but when Logan was arrested, all the information I needed was inaccessible when it became evidence.”
He furrowed his brow. “Why didn’t you go to CTU?”
Tony shook his head. “I couldn’t risk it. I couldn’t figure out who to trust. I didn’t want to tip them off in case they-”
“Did you learn nothing from what happened with Saunders? Chloe was there, even if I wasn’t-”
“No, Jack." Tony cut him off gruffly. "That was the first thing I tried to do. We had escaped together. She was barely conscious, and I carried her out of there. But as soon as I called Chloe, they pinged the signal and found us. They knocked us both out and separated us." His voice broke, and there was a twitch in his jaw. "Which was when I knew I couldn't trust anything connected to the government."
Jack was speechless. Yes, he'd come to the same conclusion when he was forced out of hiding, but the fact that this all happened after made him realise that even behind bars, this conspiracy was even more pervasive than he'd believed. Jack tried to apologise, but Tony went on.
“It doesn’t matter, Jack. Nobody could have done anything.” He said shortly. “The only records left of where she was kept and where I was kept were in Logan’s personal belongings. His own wife couldn’t access them until recently. I only got the information I needed today from Aaron Pierce on her behalf.”
Jack shook his head slowly. He thought back to what he'd learned today about his father and brother, his own flesh and blood, and their role in the conspiracy. It made his blood boil to think they'd probably been complicit in this, too.
"What's Logan's angle here? He can't use the information if he's in custody." He pointed out. "His estate is frozen."
"Come on, Jack. Do you really think that's going to last much longer? Once he's out of house arrest, I'm sure he'll pick up where he left off. I don't know what his endgame was and whether it was beyond money. But what I do know is that he wanted to make us talk. It was never just about pinning Palmer's assassination on you. It was about taking advantage of us and our information." He huffed. "I don't care about that right now. The point is, they're still holding Michelle, and I need your help to find her."
Jack sighed. “What’s the plan?”
“I-I have an address. I don’t know the full details. I don’t know what they’ve done to her or if she’s still even…” He hissed. “I was told seven hostiles were keeping her, but that was an estimate. So, I couldn’t risk doing it on my own. When I learned that you were coming back from China today, I knew you were my only chance for back-up who wasn't linked to CTU."
As he walked towards Tony, he could see that he was shaking. He placed a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s go.”
They’d split off towards the back of the house, with Tony showing no restraint in killing the people who were holding her. He’d only stalled with one of them, ensuring that Michelle was actually there. As soon as he mentioned that he was 'just following orders' with a sneer, Tony was sure they were in the right place.
Jack tried the handle of a door, finding it locked. He could faintly hear talking from the inside.
“Tell me. I need to know what the code is.” An unfamiliar, gruff voice said.
Another voice whimpered in response, quietly pleading 'no'.
Shouldering the door open, Jack entered the dark and dilapidated room. The word ‘cell’ immediately seemed more appropriate as he saw how small it was.
His eyes widened at the sight of someone towering over who he hoped to God wasn’t, but deep down knew, had to be Michelle. She was doing everything in her power to kick and push him off of her. Just as Jack went to draw his gun, the figure suddenly yelled in pain before moving back, his hand coming to his face. He stumbled, turning around to face Jack. The man’s right eye was bleeding profusely, and Jack didn’t hesitate to shoot him in the head, eliciting a scream from Michelle. As he fell to the floor, a pang struck Jack’s chest when he saw her huddled in the corner, shaking, the man’s blood splattered on her skin.
He moved towards her as fast as he could. “Oh God, Michelle…” He breathed.
Her hair was falling out, she was frail, and her gaze was flitting wildly. She was moving so much she couldn't look at him properly. He could hear how fast and shallow her breathing was and see her chest rise and fall rapidly. Upon closer inspection, the blood wasn’t just from her attacker. He could also see bruises and puckered scars all over her body. He was tentative in touching her, barely grazing her elbow with his fingers. His hand moved to her shoulders, gently pivoting her to face him.
She flinched, and Jack felt something sharp prick his skin. Her bony, bloody hand was tightly clenching a stained scalpel, now further darkened by his blood. Michelle kept it held out, creating distance between them. When he met her teary eyes, her expression was so bleak, so blank. It was no different to how Audrey looked when Cheng had brought her to the motel all those hours ago. She didn’t seem to react to him, even as he continued to say her name, who she was, and who he was. He heard her mutter something under her breath but couldn’t comprehend it.
Rather than yell and startle Michelle further, Jack grabbed his phone and dialled Tony’s number.
“Did you find her?”
“Yes, but Tony… Tony, she needs you.”
Tony felt a pit in his stomach at hearing the worry in Jack’s voice. He traced his steps frantically, bolting back to the fork in the hallway and finding the busted-down door.
“Michelle?” He called.
She perked up at the sound of his voice straight away, sniffling and mewling. Michelle was unable to form words but still irrevocably conveyed recognition. Her voice still sounded confused, as though she couldn’t understand how he was there.
He took no time in running to her side. “Jesus, sweetheart…” Tony hissed, almost too afraid to touch her without hurting her further but needing to hold her and communicate that he was there with every fibre of his being.
But Jack noticed that she didn’t even seem to completely register that it was Tony, not even when he was right in front of her, evident by her holding the scalpel out again. Tony immediately backed away, the blade narrowly missing his arm.
“Michelle, it’s me…” He looked so bewildered, so upset at her reaction.
Michelle shook her head rapidly.
His face fell. He continued to babble her name, tell her who he was, that it was safe now and he was there to help her, but to no avail. She seemed to be in denial as if it couldn’t possibly be true, keeping the scalpel held out.
“Sweetheart, I’m real. It’s okay.” He whispered, tears welling at the corners of his eyes as he realised that whatever he thought they'd done to her was no match for reality. “I’m here now.”
Her hands started to tremble, and her eyes widened as she listened to his voice. The scalpel dropped beside her, and she let out a cry of relief as her hands flung around his neck, grabbing at him urgently. But it wasn’t until her fingertips reached his face and mapped his features out that the sounds coming from her mouth sounded like his name. That she knew with more conviction who he was.
It all seemed to click in Jack’s head. Why the gunshot had scared her so much, why she couldn’t focus, why it hadn’t been until she touched Tony that she reacted fully, why even then, her eyes couldn’t meet his.
“Oh my God… Tony, she can’t see you.”
“What?” He whipped his head around, some of the blood from Michelle’s hands having left red, finger-shaped marks on his face.
“Her eyes aren’t focusing on anything. That’s why she didn’t know it was you or me.” Jack gulped. “I think whatever they did… it blinded her.”
Frantically, he pivoted her head towards him, realising there was a cloudy film over both of her eyes. The brown iris of one eye was broken. He couldn’t tell if the other side was the same, given that it was swollen shut from bruising. “Michelle... you can’t see me?”
Her lip pursed, and she shook her head.
He let out a sob and pulled her tightly to his body, burying his face in her hair. She, too, broke down, and the more she tried to speak, the more overwhelmed she became. Being in Tony’s embrace had snapped her out of the fearful state she’d been in. She was just in too much shock to be able to do anything right now except let him hold her. And Jack just prayed that would be enough. If she knew it was Tony with her and felt safe with him, then she was already more lucid than Audrey had been.
Tony looked up at him. “Get her help. Please.” He whispered.
“Tony, she needs a hospital-”
“No.” He shook his head, holding her even tighter. “No hospital. They could still be after us.”
"I can call Chloe and get her to bring a doctor to us." Jack offered, despite knowing that was exactly what had turned everything into turmoil for Tony and Michelle last time. But there was nobody else to call who wasn't connected to CTU.
Thankfully, Tony seemed to understand this because he passed him his phone.
"It's a burner. Keep it under a minute, and they won't be able to trace it."
Jack nodded and moved to the door, giving them some privacy.
“O’Brian.”
“Are you still at CTU?”
“Yeah, why?”
He hesitated, realising that he still couldn’t be sure if they were entirely safe in case a straggler of Logan’s was lurking somewhere. “I need you to send a doctor to my location. Someone you trust. Not from CTU.”
“What? I thought Audrey was fine.”
Jack sighed. “I’m not with Audrey. This isn’t about her. I can’t explain this over the phone. Just send someone. We’ll need stitches, some clean clothes…” Jack again looked over at Michelle, now realising she was clenching to keep her legs closed. He lowered his voice. “Female doctor if you can.”
“Okay… I can... I can send my GP. She's not far from CTU. I-I'll go with Morris, and we'll take her to you.” Her voice took a worried tone. “What’s going on, Jack?”
“You'll understand once you get here.”
When Chloe arrived with Morris and the GP, all they did was ask questions, bewildered by the small, old house he'd asked them to come to. But seeing Tony cradling an almost unrecognisable Michelle in his arms silenced them rather quickly. Jack explained quietly that they'd both been tortured and that Tony had escaped, but Michelle hadn't. Jack explained to the doctor what had likely been done to Michelle based on her appearance and whatever he'd seen in the hostiles' arsenal. There could be more to it, but Michelle was in no position to explain that right now. At least, not in detail.
In any case, Michelle needed to be taken care of and reminded that things would be okay, even if she couldn’t see Tony’s eyes staring back at her, trying so desperately to affirm that.
Before the doctor looked at her, Tony wanted to give her time to feel comfortable. There was a small bathtub in the house that they wiped down and disinfected. Tony peeled the dirty, torn hospital gown off her body, and she was quick to cover herself with her arms. Then, he slowly allowed the tepid, gentle stream to run over her back. She inhaled sharply, and he could see raw skin there, so he reduced the pressure as much as necessary, even though she was shivering from the cold, hugging her knees to her chest. The water turned pink from all the grime and blood as it drained. Tony hushed Michelle as she cried, using a cloth to clean some of the older bloodstains, revealing skin paler than he'd ever seen on her. He also tried his hardest to brush and detangle her hair, profusely apologising as she winced. At this moment, Tony was ever-so-slightly grateful that she couldn’t see him right now because it meant he could let the tears fall silently down his face without upsetting her further. Although, she could probably still tell he was crying from the shakiness in his voice as he reassured her.
When he helped her out of the tub, he quickly wrapped her in a towel. Again, her arms crept around his back, squeezing him tightly. He just wanted to hold her. She needed him right now. He didn’t want to have to tell her that she needed to be examined by the doctor, that she would have to find it in herself to trust somebody else when right now she was more vulnerable than ever. He placed a hand under her chin to lift her head and cupped her cheeks, looking into her eyes. Her hands reached up to mirror his actions, and for just that brief moment, it was like she was looking at him properly.
“The doctor has to take a look at you.”
Her face twisted, and she pressed her face into his chest again. She could barely form coherent sentences, but he didn’t need them to know how hard this would be. He made out the word ‘home’ and a plea for him to take her there.
“I know, baby. I know…” He said weakly, rubbing between her shoulder blades. “But I need you to do this for me first, okay? Please.”
After some more hesitation, she gave him a small nod, still not letting go of him. He felt his fingers come away sticky with blood and noticed that several of the wounds on her back were still bleeding a little. They would have to disinfect them before they were wrapped, and he cringed at the thought of how much that would hurt.
“Sweetheart…” He said softly. “You’re still bleeding on your back. The doctor’s going to need to disinfect it.”
Michelle grimaced, letting Tony slowly pivot her so her arms were wrapped over his shoulders. As the first drop of the antiseptic touched her skin, she howled out in pain. Tony had to squeeze her so she could stay still. The doctor tried to work as fast as she could, and it took every ounce of strength in Tony not to stop her, no matter how desperately Michelle screamed and begged him to.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry…” He whispered again and again, feeling her nails dig into his skin. She heaved against him, whimpering.
The doctor then took the time to carefully check any remaining wounds and scars on the front of her body. Tony sat back, putting Michelle between his legs so her head was against his collarbone. He had to keep echoing to her what the doctor was doing so she wasn't startled by her. Despite his efforts, she still became overwhelmed, so Tony gave in to her request to stop and take a break. Every touch on her skin was a flash of pain, a reminder of each beating, of each instance where they wanted her to talk, but she refused. Michelle turned to bury his face against his shoulder, moving her hands over his face, grounding herself in his presence. It broke Tony’s heart knowing that no matter how much he told her, part of her still couldn’t trust him without seeing him.
“You’re okay… you’re with me…” He said, over and over again, holding her tightly to him.
“You can’t sedate her?” Tony mouthed to the doctor, not wanting Michelle to hear. This would be easier and less intense for her if she was asleep.
She shook her head, pointing at a series of track marks on Michelle’s arm. “I can't tell if she's been drugged without a blood test. If they did, a sedative could interact dangerously.”
He nodded glumly.
As they tried again, Tony was surprised to see Michelle’s eyes twitch as the doctor moved a small torch over her face.
The doctor smiled slightly. “The fact that you’re still reacting to that is good.”
“Can you do anything about it now?” Tony asked.
She shook her head. "I’ll need to refer you to a specialised surgeon to repair the broken iris and see the extent of the damage.” She then pressed her lips together. “It’s hard to tell when we don’t know what happened. If it was physical trauma, a chemical burn, light exposure…”
Michelle made a small noise as the doctor said ‘light’. They both looked at her expectantly, and she cleared her throat. She explained in short fragments that they used to shine bright light into her eyes and force her eyelids open. Over time, she stopped being able to distinguish shapes. She could only tell if it was light or dark around her.
“That could mean the effect is reversible, although I can’t guarantee anything.”
As the doctor said this, Tony could feel the release of some of the tension in Michelle's body against his, her heart rate slowing a little.
But when the doctor very quietly, very calmly, asked Michelle to spread her legs, she shook her head vehemently, and her breath hitched. He asked her very quietly if they assaulted her in that way, but she shook her head, to both his relief and confusion.
“I never let them,” Michelle said quietly, and he recalled how fiercely she’d fought him off before realising it was him. She went on to explain that they only ever hurt her physically. They gave up on anything that might mentally affect her, including drugging her, because they knew she wouldn’t be able to tell them anything if she wasn’t lucid. Still, that didn't stop them from trying on occasion, so she'd had to keep her guard up.
It seemed too good to be true that they'd been somewhat considerate in their torture. But if these people had been paid by Logan or people associated with him, they would have been professionals. Professionals who knew how to make people talk without destroying them mentally so it wouldn't affect their memory. They'd likely been ex-federal agents or private military contractors. Tony had come to that conclusion during his own torture. They hadn’t just been random street thugs trying to control her. No, they'd had a job: to keep her alive and well enough to extract information from her for years. Tony wondered whether blinding her had been an accident or intentional, a fear tactic to control her and prevent her escape.
However, for the sake of her health, the doctor would still need to verify her claims in case they assaulted her while she was unconscious.
“It’s going to be okay…” He whispered. “Trust me, please? She won’t hurt you.”
It took a few more tearful tries, but eventually, she stopped squeezing her knees together and let the doctor examine her. Her hand gripped Tony’s so tightly that her knuckles turned white, but it was all over soon enough. True to her word, there was no sign of sexual assault, to their relief. The doctor concluded that she’d need some antibiotics and painkillers, but other than that, she would be physically okay. As for her mental well-being, the doctor hoped that with some rest and being taken care of by someone she trusted, she would be able to feel safe, even if the loss of sight was frightening in the meantime. She gave them both referrals for therapists. Otherwise, the doctor could come to them. No hospitals. Nothing overwhelming.
Michelle simply needed to be home.
The clothes Chloe had brought from CTU looked the right size, but Tony was still surprised to see how loose they were on her. When he pulled the sweatshirt over her head, he tucked a hair behind her ear, and the corners of her lips upturned.
“Thank you…” He whispered. “I know that was really hard for you.”
He carried her out to where Jack, Chloe and Morris stood in the hall. Michelle asked him to go home again, not having forgotten what he'd promised her. Tony then made a hesitant face. Since he’d stayed legally dead for his safety, he hadn’t been able to access any of their bank accounts. The house they’d moved to after leaving CTU had been sold as stated by their wills. Over the past year, he'd moved from apartment to apartment, never able to find a home without her. He hadn't been able to sleep knowing she was out there somewhere. It had been so hard being apart. They’d done it once by their own choice, and he and Michelle had vowed never to do it again when they'd gotten back together, no matter what. And with leaving CTU, they'd believed the chance of something so shattering happening to them again was slim. Slim, but not zero, as they'd now learnt. Tony wanted nothing more than to press reset and take them both back to that terrible morning. But he couldn't. He wanted to give her a home and a place to feel safe, but he couldn't right now, and it was killing him.
“You can stay with us.” Morris offered. "We have a spare bedroom and bathroom."
“Thank you,” Tony said gratefully.
Chloe could only stand there, her lips pressed together, and tears welled in her eyes. "I just... I can't believe you're both alive. And that Logan..." She frowned. "Logan's gotten away with this the whole time."
Hearing her say that reminded Tony that it wasn't all over yet. They had to be certain that all of Logan’s associates had either been arrested or killed. Only then could they say they were safe. Michelle was their best hope of having complete details, but they couldn't ask her now. She was on the verge of falling asleep from exhaustion, her arms around his neck as they walked outside. Jack noticed the tiny trails of blood from Tony’s neck, and he realised Michelle’s grip was so fierce she’d broken skin. Tony explained to her quietly that they were going to Chloe and Morris' house. She was a little surprised to hear his name mentioned, and only then did Tony recall they'd been divorced. It was nice to hear that they'd made it work again, too.
In the meantime, Jack would stay there to aid with the investigation. He would selectively call people in, starting with Aaron Pierce, Bill, and Karen, when she got back from DC. Tony thanked him and knew undoubtedly that if anybody could resolve this efficiently and with assurance, it was him. He could tell Jack was doing this out of guilt, too, but Tony affirmed that he'd never regretted helping him go into hiding. All he asked now was for his help in keeping him and Michelle safe.
As Chloe and Morris drove them both home in silence, all Tony could think about was the other uncertainty of their future. Yes, he should be incredibly grateful that they were both alive after everything, even if they'd lost the baby. But it had been confronting to see Michelle so helplessly dependent on him. It wasn't just about the loss of her sight, although he knew that having that restored might help her feel less afraid. He was still thinking about how long it had taken for her to recognise him. The tremor in her voice. The way that even in sleep, she was gripping him fiercely. People didn't just 'recover' from torture. It could take days, weeks, months... and maybe some things just wouldn't be the same.
"We're here," Chloe said, stopping him from spiralling further.
The spare room had already been made up. Morris and Chloe showed them around. After laying Michelle on the bed and covering her with a blanket, Tony took the chance to freshen up and grabbed a CTU t-shirt and sweatpants from the bag of assorted clothes they'd brought. When he came back into the bedroom, he paused and pursed his lips as he looked at Michelle. She was here. She was really here. No matter how much it hurt to see her afraid and in pain... the shock and relief of her being alive still hadn't worn off.
As he got into bed beside her, half-drawing the curtains to prevent the mid-morning daylight from disturbing them too much, Michelle stirred at the feeling of the mattress creaking. She uttered his name, and he stroked her hair, confirming he was there.
“Don’t go,” Michelle whispered. “Please.”
He tried to fight back the tears forming in the corners of his eyes again.
“I'm not going anywhere,” Tony replied quietly.
Despite how much he wanted to hug her, he reminded himself that it might still alarm her to feel that without warning. Instead, Tony let Michelle find her way over to him with her hands, and he wrapped his arms around her as she curled up against his body.
“You’re with me, now.”
Tony could count on one hand the number of times he left Michelle’s side those following weeks. It was usually only for a bathroom or shower break. It had been so hard to even manage that when Michelle would desperately pull at his shirt and whimper when she felt the break of contact. He would have to tell her several times that he would be right back and that she wasn’t alone. But when he was there, she was fine. She was relieved to hear familiar voices, to be fed, clothed and able to sleep somewhere that wasn’t a cold, hard floor. Gradually, she spoke in longer sentences, feeling comforted, realising that this was real, that she wasn’t with them again, and that she never would be.
But deep down, her subconscious still haunted her, only revealing itself to Tony when the sun set. Michelle always fell asleep with her body resting against his. He would watch her until she fell asleep and then for a little while after. Just to remind himself that she was really with him. At some point, she’d start to shake and whimper. Sometimes, it would stop with a simple hush and caress of his hand against her cheek. Other times, it would escalate. She would start to kick and scream, and he would have to force her awake to snap her back to reality. Then, he’d hold her as she sobbed in his arms, begging him not to leave, not to disappear. And through his own tears, he would promise her he wouldn't until the flutter of her heart slowed down and exhaustion overcame her. The things she said would replay in his mind. They were typically along the lines of ‘no’ or ‘I don’t know anything’. He expected as much. They were the things he’d screamed day in and day out while they’d tortured him too before his escape. But occasionally she’d scream ‘don’t take him’. And that, Tony, couldn’t figure out. He wanted to ask her, but any time anybody asked her about her experience, she would start to tremble, mutter things that didn’t make sense and slowly slip into the state she'd been in when Jack found her.
When they finally got the relieving news that they could attempt the surgery to repair the broken iris and examine her eyes, Tony felt anxious, starting to wonder whether the return of her sight wouldn’t be enough to return her clarity. He'd only experienced a couple of months of torture by their hand. More than that, he'd been less injured from the bomb to start with. In Michelle's case, she’d already been so weak from her comatose state that she wouldn’t have had the energy to move, let alone run. And the more they’d hurt her, the slimmer her chances of escape had grown, finally becoming futile when they’d blinded her.
The night before her scheduled surgery, Tony found himself unable to sleep, looking through the information the doctor had given him. There was no guarantee the surgery would be successful. He knew that, and Michelle knew that. They weren’t going to be hopeful. However, even if what they found could be reversed, there was no guarantee she’d have perfect vision, either. She still may be considered legally blind. In some cases, they could prescribe corrective lenses, but in others, she would need more support. He wasn't hung up on that. She was alive, and she was with him. It didn’t matter if that meant things had to change. But he just didn’t want to let her down like he had the first time.
“Tony?” Michelle asked, half-asleep from beside him. “What are you doing up?”
He was sitting in bed with his laptop. Her hand came to his forearm.
“Nothing, I’m just-“
“I can see you’ve got a laptop open. Or at least… a screen.”
Tony sighed, staring at the half a dozen tabs of blog posts and forums regarding how one made their home accessible for someone vision impaired. There was also a tab about guide dogs.
“I’m just thinking about tomorrow.”
She bit her lip, snuggling closer to him. “I know. Me too.”
“I want you to know that…” He turned to look down at her, still slightly jarred by the fact that she couldn’t meet his eye. “No matter what happens, whether they can or can’t do anything for your eyes… it doesn’t change anything. I love you so much, and we’ll do whatever we need to accommodate and find a way to give you your independence and your life.”
She seemed very affected by this, her eyes welling with tears. Michelle then slowly sat up on one elbow before running her hand up his bicep, neck, and onto his face so she could kiss his cheek. “I love you, too. I… I’m scared, but I know you’re going to be there for me, and that’s all that matters. We’re both here.”
“Yeah. We are.” He agreed, letting her mutual reassurance be the thing to make him shut the laptop and settle in next to her.
Thankfully, the procedure went well. To Tony’s hope, the surgeon stated she believed that what they did should have had some effect on her vision. She had to wear bandages on both eyelids for another few weeks, though, so they wouldn’t know until then. Those weeks were, in some ways, harder than the first few after her rescue because the bandages blocked out light completely, so whatever small semblance of orientation Michelle had had was gone. They counted down the days anxiously until they could have the follow-up appointment at the clinic. But again, all Tony did was remind her that no matter what happened, they were going to be okay. They were going to figure this out.
When the time finally came, Michelle held his hand from the start of the car ride all the way into the clinic. They took an accessible entrance out the back since the front staircase was too crowded, which also helped to calm them both since they were still on edge about being tracked by Logan's people. Jack and Bill had a few leads, but they weren't at the point of feeling safe yet. Still, Tony had faith that that would sort itself out as well, and they could have the peace they deserved.
The doctor unwrapped the bandages slowly, and Tony could only examine Michelle's reaction with intense anticipation. She blinked a few times before squeezing her eyes shut tightly, and the surgeon quickly got up and dimmed the lights slightly.
"Sorry, that should be a little more comfortable for you now."
Tony watched Michelle open her eyes properly. He squeezed her hand, making her turn. The iris had been repaired, and her pupils dilated and contracted in alternation for a moment before settling. But before she could speak, Tony felt relief flood his body as he realised she could see him. Her face gave it away, but when she threw her arms around him, not in the way of fear like she had ever since her reunion, but happiness, that was when the tears started coming.
"You're really here." She murmured.
He sniffled, holding her tighter, before the doctor spoke after a beat, reminding them both she was there.
"I, uh, hate to interrupt, but Michelle, we can do a full eye examination now so we can send you home with a prescription." The doctor offered with a sheepish smile.
She did know what they'd been through, but they would have plenty of time to do this later. Michelle nodded, pulling away and noticing her very clinical surroundings. They, unfortunately, reminded her of the abandoned hospital she'd been held in, together with Tony, before they'd been separated. Not that she remembered all that much of it. Just enough for this to trigger her. In a way, she was somewhat grateful she hadn't been able to see in the lead-up to the surgery because the visuals of a hospital would have done nothing for her anxiety. What was also unnerving was the noise since, according to Tony, the practice was shared by multiple specialists.
But what made her freeze and start to hyperventilate was the sound of a crying baby from another room. Her eyes widened, and everything came back to her at once like a punch to the gut. She looked at Tony, who reacted to her concern.
“T-They took the baby…” She said, voice heavy with realisation.
“What?”
“They took our son away from me…”
Tony's expression softened. Their son couldn’t be alive. It wasn't possible. It just wasn’t. It was a miracle in and of itself that Michelle had survived the car bomb, let alone... Was it just that she was only now able to process the grief because he was with her? Because she was no longer being tortured and, for the most part, not worrying about major recovery from torture? They'd put her in a coma. He knew that had been to heal her. But... surely someone would have said something. If those people had known she was pregnant, they would have used it against her. It just didn't make sense.
Michelle looked very distressed, so he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, trying to maintain his own composure. "Michelle..." He started gently. "The bomb nearly killed you. I... I don't think the baby survived, sweetheart."
She shook her head. “No. I-I delivered him. I held him in my arms, Tony. I’m not crazy, I swear.”
"Even if it didn't happen then, with what happened after..." He wanted to try to explain that it could have been an effect of the trauma. A way for her to cope. Something. Anything. He didn't want her to get her hopes up. He wanted her to understand the logistics here. But she wouldn't have it.
“No!” Her eyes were wet with tears. “Why... why won’t you believe me?”
Tony sighed. It wasn't that he didn’t want to believe her. Of course, he did. Their son being alive was the only thing that could make this moment even happier. But if it was a lie, if it wasn’t true, and logically, that’s what Tony had told himself for so long, then it would break his heart to have to go through that grief again.
“I might not remember everything, but I remember this.” Her voice hardened. “It’s all coming back to me. U-Until you found me, I didn’t know what was real or what I had made up in my head. But I know our son was taken from us because it was all my fault. A-And all I could think about was how upset you’d be.”
A crease formed in his brow. “How could it be your fault?”
“After they caught us and after they took you, they started to interrogate me. I-It didn’t take me long to realise that they weren't going to back off. They hadn't just chosen us randomly. They wanted us for a reason." He watched the fear creep back into her expression as she recalled this, but she pushed through. "I also knew when I woke up that I was still pregnant. I didn't really look it. As soon as they started getting physical, I screamed and told them I was pregnant. I... I begged them not to hurt me anymore. T-The doctor they had checked me out, and he confirmed it. He treated me then, and the hostiles agreed not to touch me if I gave them the information they wanted." Her face screwed up slightly in anger and shame. “I-I thought I could pull one over on them. I tried to tell them false or outdated information. I told them things I knew would trigger firewalls or wipe their system. I did whatever I could to prevent them from getting what they wanted. They were asking for big things. I couldn't... I couldn't let them have them." She took in a shuddering breath and wouldn't meet his eye. "But they figured it out. They knew I was playing them. And once our son was born, just as I thought I had something left after everything they'd taken from me..."
Michelle was so relieved her plan had worked. Her son was here. He was healthy. He was safe. And she hadn’t compromised CTU. She cradled him against her chest, still undecided whether she wanted to name him after Tony. It felt like giving up. Some part of her still believed he was out there looking for her. The other part was slowly processing the fact that she was going to die here, and God only knew what would happen to her son.
But when one of the men, Anderson, the leader of the mercenary group, suddenly burst through the door, his expression furious and all but directed towards her, she realised she had made a very big mistake.
"You think we wouldn't figure it out? That you were pulling one over on us the whole time?" He slowly walked towards her, and she clutched her son tighter. "You made a promise, Michelle. We agreed not to touch you or your son so long as you gave us what we wanted..."
She looked up, trying to put on a brave face. She hadn't even been given painkillers for the birth. She was too exhausted to bluff her way out of this, but even then... she wasn't even sure how to.
Anderson looked beside him and motioned with his head. “Take him away.”
Before she could even move, the baby was snatched from her by one of the younger mercenaries.
“No!” She screamed, feeling arms pin her weakened body down. The baby was crying and crying, squirming in the grip of the person holding him. Desperately, she tried to fight the people holding her.
“Get rid of it.” He ordered.
“N-No, please. Don’t hurt him!" She begged. "Don’t!-“
Anderson tutted. “This is all your fault. If you really cared about your son, you wouldn't have taken such a stupid risk.”
The man holding the baby was hesitant. Michelle recognised him not as one of the people who'd interrogated her but as a hacker who just followed Anderson's instructions and relayed her information. She'd always thought he seemed a little meeker like he was being coerced to do his bidding.
“Do it now,” Anderson emphasised.
Fearfully, he fled, the baby still wailing in the distance. She was beaten senseless, the way they'd wanted to all those months ago, and then left alone to weep. No matter how much they'd hurt her, nothing hurt more than the guilt slowly consuming her as she realised how much she'd screwed up. Her entire body ached, and she was barely conscious. The young man who’d taken the baby then came back. Michelle mustered her remaining energy to scowl at him despite the bruising in her jaw. But as he neared, she noticed how worried his expression was.
“I-I didn’t kill him.” He whispered, skittishly looking around as though he might be heard. “I-I drove him to the nearest hospital. I watched a nurse take him in. He’s safe.”
She looked up, finding the man’s eyes entirely genuine. If anybody else in the crew found out, he would be killed, no question about it.
“Thank you…” Michelle breathed.
She was sobbing by the end of her explanation, and he was holding her, unable to feel anything but sorrow for her. If this had happened before they'd been taken, Tony could have easily been angry at her decision to risk their son's life in exchange for protecting CTU. Her sense of duty was important to her. He'd always known that and that it was why she'd struggled with leaving CTU behind. She'd tried to balance both her loyalty to CTU and their family but had failed. However, after everything they'd been through, he couldn't focus on that. It wasn't out of pity. It wasn't something he'd hold onto for when she was feeling better. There was just no need to hold this against her. Who was he to be upset at her when she'd suffered and grieved so much over this?
"I'm so sorry." Michelle gasped, her face buried in his chest.
Tony hushed her, telling her it was okay. It wasn't just to placate her. His lingered on the fact that their son had been taken to a hospital. That meant he was alive. He had to be. He could have been taken into foster care or adopted or something, but he was alive. They could find him.
More than that, they had to.
“How can we find him without a name or record?” Jack sighed. The news was good, of course, that Tony and Michelle’s son had survived. But it didn’t feel appropriate to celebrate just yet. After all, he wasn’t with them. They’d lost a year of being able to raise him, and other than a vague story about a nurse picking up the baby, there was nothing else to go on. “Michelle was held in the middle of nowhere. You wouldn’t be able to pinpoint which hospital the baby was taken to.”
Chloe typed away at her laptop. “I can narrow it down to about six, assuming they didn't go further than necessary. We could also put in an approximate date range for when he was taken there. But still, that would give us so many babies to try to look through. It would take hours for the search results to load.”
“Wait…” Morris started. “I have something that might help. It’s only in beta, so it’s not perfect, but functions nonetheless. It's an extension of the search software that includes a facial recognition element. It's designed to filter results by resemblance to a given input. You're supposed to, in theory, be able to give, say, a picture of a relative to help narrow down a missing person."
Michelle looked over at Tony. He was still overwhelmed and apprehensive, and she couldn't blame him. Some part of him still doubted that their son existed, let alone that the search to find him would be successful. He’d told himself for nearly two years that it wasn’t possible. It had been hard enough to believe that Michelle was alive, let alone their baby. More than that, despite the logic of her story, there was no guarantee that it hadn't been some act, some way to manipulate her and give her false hope. They'd fed him lies during his torture, too. Although he'd been tenacious in his memories and beliefs, it hadn't been easy to resist tempting their ideas. It wasn’t that he didn’t have faith in Michelle to have done the same; Tony was just too exhausted after searching for her for so long to put hope into finding their son. He couldn't be disappointed again. And he couldn't stand to see her heartbroken again, either.
“I mean, we’re looking for his newborn photos." Morris pointed out. "So, the extension might not work particularly well. But I dare say it’s worth a try.”
“Anything is better than nothing.” Michelle agreed. “Whatever it takes to find him.”
The search was left to run overnight, narrowing down hundreds of images. Michelle was restless, the anxiety of the search too much to bear. Tony had been too, but his fatigue had won, leaving him asleep beside her. Michelle watched him for a while, lightly stroking his back. Questions raced in her mind as she tried to sleep. There was no telling how many results they would have to look through when it finished. Even still, the nurse who took the baby could have transferred him to a larger hospital if there were any issues. Maybe the six hospitals they’d chosen were wrong. Maybe it was hopeless after all. Maybe the man had lied to Michelle to get her to comply, as Tony had suggested.
She still felt guilty about it. No matter how much Tony had tried to assure her that she'd been in a difficult position and that her intentions had been good, she still felt awful. She'd let him and their son down. Now that the possibility of finding him was tangible, Michelle vowed never to let her family's safety slip her priorities again. She promised to fight that part of herself. She and Tony had suffered more than enough. All that mattered now was moving forward and putting distance between themselves and their past.
Michelle eventually realised that she wouldn't be sleeping anytime soon, so she grabbed her glasses on the nightstand and made her way to the kitchen to get some water. She treaded quietly, not wanting to wake anybody else. When she got to the sink, she stood and looked out the window at the sky. It was a simple sight. But she had so much newfound appreciation for it. For those horrific months, she hadn’t been able to anticipate what Logan’s people would do to her next, hadn’t been able to identify the people coming and going, and hadn’t even been able to feel safe in her husband’s arms because she couldn’t be sure it was him, no matter how much she caressed him and listened to his voice. But it was over now.
As she went back to bed, she stopped at the sound of a beep from the study. She silently paced into the dark room, looking at the screen.
Search completed.
Her heart leapt in her chest. As much as she wanted to wake Tony, she couldn’t wait. She had to see if the search had turned up anything worthwhile. Not bothering to sit, she leaned over the desk, using the mouse to slowly click through the photos. Although her memories of her son were brief, they were certainly there. She had faith that she would know if she saw him again. Anxiety grew within her as she neared the end of the list, wondering if maybe she was being naive. Maybe she really couldn’t remember him properly. Maybe she’d already skipped it. Maybe it wasn’t there at all.
Suddenly, her fingers trembled as she stopped on one of the photos. She noticed the slight curl of his dark hair, the almond shape of his eyes, and the shape of his face, and everything fell into place. Her short-lived visions of him were coming to the forefront of her mind, and she knew in every fibre of her being that she was looking at her son. The glass, now thankfully empty, in her other hand fell to the hardwood floor with a shatter. Michelle started shaking and heard footsteps behind her. When she turned and saw Tony, a noise of relief escaped her.
“Hey…” He said softly, looking at her with worry. “What are you doing up? It’s two in the morning-”
“I’ve found him." Michelle tugged his arm, dragging him to the screen. "I looked through the search results, and I found him.”
He went to speak, but as soon as he saw the photo, he fell silent and gasped slightly.
“T-That’s him.” She said, her voice shaking. “L-Look at him and tell me he’s not our son.”
He swung his head from side to side slowly, staring more intently. The last time he’d seen his son was in a blurry ultrasound the day before the car bomb. But now, seeing this baby and all his tiny features, Tony realised the visions in his mind over all these years were now manifested in front of him.
Morris, Chloe, and Jack had also gotten up by this point and joined them. Tony and Michelle didn’t have to explain very much; the photo on the computer told the story clearly.
“Let me get his file up.” Chloe kept the photo open on one of the monitors so Tony and Michelle could keep looking at it and used the other to access the details of his file. They all agreed the resemblance was strong and that this was quite likely their son. Chloe couldn’t help but feel connected to the whole situation, too, her own pregnancy now feeling more real than it had before.
“His name is Elliott… Elliott Porter.”
“Elliott…” Michelle whispered. Coincidentally, that had been one of the names on their short-list they'd written before being taken. Judging by the slight smile on Tony's face, he seemed to remember this, too. Everything felt even more real now. There wasn't just a face but also a name, an identity. But the question as to who had him still lingered.
Chloe continued to type away, now bringing up a second photo of a young woman with cropped light-brown hair, blue-grey eyes and fair skin. She looked about Kim's age.
“This is the woman who adopted him, Kara Porter. She’s a nurse at one of the hospitals.” Chloe moved her chair so they could see. “She must have taken him in, but there are no birth parents listed on his file. The nurse could have done a DNA test, but either she didn't, or... did, but didn't record the results."
Jack furrowed his brow. “I feel like I’ve seen her before, but the name doesn’t ring a bell.”
“Me too.” Tony and Michelle agreed, also focusing on the woman’s face.
“Actually… so do I," Chloe added. "Let me run a check for other names she might be using."
“I… don’t?” Morris said. “Maybe she's associated with a CTU mission from when all of you were there.”
With Morris’ tip, it didn’t take long for Chloe to realise just how much this woman’s real name made sense when she delved into the file.
“I’ve got it. She’s only gone by ‘Kara Porter’ for the last few years.” Chloe then scrolled down. “She was formerly known as… oh my God…” She trailed off, too taken aback by the identity.
“Formerly known as what?” Tony asked worriedly.
She met his eyes. “Formerly known as Jane Saunders.”
The three of them stood outside the house nervously. Stephen Saunders’ daughter was the last person they expected to have Elliott. It seemed too unlikely to be simply coincidental. It appeared Jane had kept under the radar since that day. She had no criminal record or anything of note in her file other than her name change. Jack recalled how shocked Jane had been by her father's actions that day, so it was unlikely she was working with his associates or doing anything malicious. But they couldn’t be sure. And if she had, in fact, done a DNA test on the baby and found Tony and Michelle’s names on file, she wouldn’t exactly have considered them strangers. There was a good chance she knew whose child she had.
Jack knocked on the door, having already decided she was home judging by the car in the driveway. Jane opened the door, still wearing scrubs from her shift, the fatigue evident on her face. That fatigue soon became surprise. Her eyes widened, and her mouth fell agape.
“It’s… it’s you.” She said to Jack. The voice was slightly more mature than the last time they heard it. She then looked at Tony and Michelle. “Oh my God. You’re both alive.” She breathed.
Michelle and Tony looked between them, realising she’d clearly seen their files.
“Where’s the boy? Where’s Elliott, Jane?” Jack asked worriedly, still trying to discern her reaction, afraid that something was wrong.
“H-He’s asleep. He’s safe. Oh… you probably think I kidnapped him. I-I…” Jane placed a hand on her forehead, looking beside herself, her voice full of panic. “Come in, please. Let me explain.”
She seemed desperate to convey that everything was fine. More importantly, she seemed pleased that they were all there. As Jane led them into the living room, Jack confirmed what he'd read in her file: she lived alone. She wasn't married or in a de facto relationship. It was just her and Elliott.
They sat down at her kitchen table, and Jane took a deep breath before she spoke.
“I-I had wanted a child for a long time. I wanted to be a single parent. I didn’t want to force myself into a relationship that I didn't want. I also didn’t want my child to have a bad relationship with their father the way I did. I didn’t want to rely on someone else to be there for them. I’d been kept on waiting lists at clinics and adoption agencies, and I began to think it was hopeless. Then, one day, I found a baby abandoned in one of the waiting areas at the hospital. I was so worried. He was in so much distress.” She bit her lip. “We checked cameras. The man who left him had gone in and out. Nobody had any idea who he was. We put out notices, asked patients, and did everything we could. But we didn't turn up anything. So I took it upon myself to do the DNA test."
She looked between Tony and Michelle.
“As soon as I learned who his parents were, I remembered you both, of course, but it confused me because you were both listed as deceased and had been for nearly a year. I couldn’t understand how that was possible. He was a newborn. I-I had tried so hard to block that day from my mind. The hostage exchange, the interrogation, watching my father do those horrible things.” She glanced at Tony now. “Then, when I heard you were arrested, I felt so guilty, like I should have testified or done something to help. I understood why you did what you had to do. I always thought you being charged with treason was so harsh when you were trying to protect someone you love. Something that anyone in your position would have done.”
“I remember the lawyer suggesting you testify, but we never found you, Jane. You’d disappeared.” Michelle recalled.
She looked away. “I was scared. To find out that my father was a terrorist kind of flipped my world upside-down. The police suggested Witness Protection or, at least, changing my name, so I did. ‘Saunders’ was pretty common, but I couldn’t risk it. I moved colleges. I quit my arts degree to start nursing. I felt like I needed to do something good with my life. I felt like with all the destruction my father had caused, I could at least try to make up for it somehow.”
The three of them could see how much anguish was on her face. They couldn’t imagine how hard it must have been for her to have been sucked into that whirlwind of chaos the virus outbreak had caused by her own father, of all people. It was honourable that she was trying to do something good with her life. They were relieved that it hadn’t gone the other way. It would have been so tempting, so easy for her to follow in his footsteps, but she hadn’t.
“So when I found out who Elliott’s biological parents were, I felt like it was a sign.”
“Why didn’t you list Tony and Michelle’s names on file?” Jack asked calmly. He remembered with a pang of guilt how brutally he’d interrogated her that day. He’d been exhausted with all that was happening, on edge from heroin withdrawal. Now that they knew she meant no harm to any of them or Elliott, Jack just wanted to understand the facts. Elliott was nearly a year old now. Tony and Michelle had missed such a critical time in their son’s life. But ultimately, it was likely that she'd done the right thing. Having their names exposed could have put them at greater risk, Tony in particular, since he'd been on the run.
“Something felt wrong. Like I’d be putting Elliott in danger. I just lied and told the other staff there were no results. We were at capacity. We couldn't keep him there. But I didn't want him to be taken into foster care. I offered to take care of him. It was established that I'd been preparing to adopt a child anyway, right down to having an ever-growing list of baby names, so nobody was too concerned. So I took him home." There was something very fond in her expression, and Jack felt assured that Elliott had been in safe hands. "And as time went on, it became pretty clear that nobody was looking for him. No missing persons files had gone up. And since I knew the truth, I felt like it was my job to keep him safe.”
Michelle sniffled. “Well… thank you for doing that. You have no idea what we’ve been through. The fact that you’ve kept him safe and care about him means a lot.”
Jane could see how wearied and troubled both of them looked. She remembered how much they’d been through on the day of the virus outbreak, how her father had taken Michelle hostage, how afraid both of them had been when the exchange had happened. It sent a chill down her spine to think of what had happened since. Tony’s prison sentence, for a start. And seeing the three of them today had scared her, too. But she was so happy now that she'd had the chance to explain herself. More than that, she was happy that Elliott could be reunited with them.
Suddenly, the sound of a baby crying interrupted the silence. Instinctively, Jane got up to go to his room. She watched the demeanour change in Tony and Michelle's expressions immediately. Tears had welled in their eyes, but they seemed too shocked to move.
Jane offered a small smile. “Well, don’t you want to see him?”
They were speechless but nodded, and she encouraged them to follow her. Tony helped Michelle stand, not letting go of her hand as they walked to the small nursery. The walls were a soft mint green, and the way the furniture was set up reminded Michelle and Tony so poignantly of the little yellow nursery they’d left behind in their home all that time ago. Jane cooed to the baby as she picked him up. Jack thought for a moment about Kim, wondering if she had a family of her own now, wondering where she was. He just prayed she was safe and happy.
Michelle let out a shaky breath as Jane passed Elliott to her. All the features she’d identified on the computer screen were now in front of her. Elliott, their son, was real. She was still riddled with anxiety, so afraid that her son wouldn’t recognise her. She was worried that too much time had passed. Holding her son hadn’t been something she’d anticipated today. Getting him back, yes, but she hadn't clicked that today would be the day she'd hold him, look into his eyes, and feel that overwhelming adoration for him surge in her chest. Elliott stilled for a moment, his deep brown eyes scrutinising her and Tony. Michelle felt a lump in her throat when the expression Elliott finally settled on was one of recognition.
He knew who he was looking at.
Michelle started murmuring to him, and Tony ran his hand down the length of his body, no longer able to suppress his tears. Everything Michelle had said was true. They had him back. He was safe. He was healthy. Their family was whole again. When Michelle let him hold Elliott, he thought his heart might stop. It was the most overwhelming but wonderful feeling, and it thrilled Tony to realise that this was only the beginning. They might have missed the first year of his life, but they would have many more to come.
It didn’t take long for them to realise that Jane’s role in Elliott’s life was no longer what she’d thought it’d be. Michelle turned to her, still in tears, wanting to speak but unable to find the words. Tony found it in himself to try.
“I-If you need more time with him, then that’s okay. You deserve to stay in his life. You’ve done so much for him and for us." Tony said earnestly. "I-I don’t think we’re going to be able to handle this on our own just yet. Please, Jane.”
Jane smiled wetly. “I-I'd be honoured. My father was one of the people who took away your happiness. I’m glad I could be the one to bring it back.”
Three Months Later
Michelle woke with a scream. Tony heard her and quickly took her in his arms, hushing her as she shook. He felt sweat on her back and tears fall on his shirt.
“You’re okay… I’ve got you. You’re okay…”
Burying her head in his chest, she clung to him tightly, trying to even out her breathing, muffling the remnant sobs coming out of her. This happened less than it used to, but it hadn’t stopped completely. He still had dreams like this from time to time, too. Michelle pulled away at the sound of a smaller, slightly higher-pitched cry. She squeezed her eyes shut, cursing quietly under her breath. She’d woken him, and it wasn’t the first time this had happened either. She hated it every time, no matter how much Tony reassured her that it wasn't her fault. Both of them got up and went to Elliott's room. Michelle lifted him into her arms and cradled him against her.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. Mommy just had a bad dream. You can go back to sleep…” Michelle whispered, kissing the top of his head, continuing to apologise tearfully again and again but trying not to let her son see how upset she was.
Her love for him was stronger than she’d even thought possible. Their family had been inseparable since their reunion. The fear that their son wouldn’t be as attached to them as he should have had quickly been proven wrong. Because just as Michelle had clung to the memory of their son while she was being held, Elliott had done so too. Of course, he still loved Jane. She was all he’d known for the first year or so of his life. But now he simply had two more faces to look at every day. Jack came by often, too, but seeing the two of them have their family whole again had given him the drive to set out and find Kim to make things right between them. He wasn’t going back to CTU. He wanted to leave it behind for good. Chloe and Morris were also there, and now that they knew Chloe was having a boy, it was hard not to get excited by the thought of their sons playing together. Plus, since she’d now gotten to the top of the adoption waiting list, Jane would be bringing home a new addition soon as well.
It was a slightly unconventional set-up for their family, but it worked.
To her relief, and Tony’s, it didn’t take long for Elliott to fall asleep again. Gently, Michelle set him down but didn’t go back to where Tony stood at the door. Instead, she sat down at the small daybed by the window, pulling her knees to her chest. Her eyes didn’t leave the crib. Tony sighed.
He understood that she needed to watch him.
For her, the fear of losing her son again every time she closed her eyes was still real. As was the guilt she felt over being the reason for losing him in the first place, no matter how many times he told her he didn't blame her for it. Both of them spent every waking minute with their son, feeling as though they needed to make up for the time they’d lost. So, he joined her on the daybed, moving her only slightly so he could wrap his arms around her from behind, planting a small kiss on her temple.
“Are we going to be okay?” Michelle said, barely above a whisper. “After all that we’ve been through... can we really do this?”
Tony hugged her, letting out a breath, knowing he needed to say this for his own reassurance as well. Even if they put the fake smile on and tried their best, insecurity still got the better of them sometimes. Even though Bill and Karen had long since assured them that Logan’s people had been taken care of, it was hard not to keep looking over their shoulders. Even though Jane had enough photos to fill a museum, they still mourned their time apart and time without their son, and it hurt to think about what they’d missed. Each and every little thing that they should have been there for. At the same time, they didn’t let that upset them too much because, at the end of the day, they were so lucky and so grateful that he’d been taken care of by someone who genuinely loved him and had, without even knowing the full story, protected him from the dangers of their past. Most importantly, she hadn’t had an issue with giving them their rightful custody. Things were going to be okay. Things were okay. They just had to keep reminding themselves of that.
“Yes. We have Elliott. We have our family again. With the three of us together… we'll heal.”
“I-I don’t want him to disappear.” Michelle looked up at him, eyes tearful.
He brushed a strand of hair from her face.
“He won’t, Michelle.”
And in his voice, she knew it was true. That the time for worrying and grieving was over, and they could simply be a family now.
That was the only thing they had to do now.
Michelle nodded slowly and returned her gaze to Elliott, feeling Tony rub her back as they watched him until the sun rose and their son woke with a smile.