Try to Slip Past His Defense Without Granting Innocence

"A polygraph?" Renee looked at Jack, bewildered. "Almeida can easily pass a polygraph, Jack. He's a sociopath."

"But he won't lie to me."

"He already has lied to you today," she pointed out, perhaps questioning whether he really had been exposed to that neurotoxin.

"Tony knows he has no way out now. I'm not doing this for the investigation: I'm doing this so I can understand and make peace with it."

Renee's expression softened. "But he's so far gone, Jack. You said it yourself."

"I just need one more chance," he begged. "There's a missing piece here. It can't just be about Michelle. I know he would go to the ends of the earth for her; I've seen it firsthand, and I shouldn't have underestimated him today. But I have to see this through."

Frankly, Jack had wanted to do this the second Tony showed up at the FBI, but as usual, things had gotten out of control so quickly. He had oscillated between trusting Tony as much as he had ten years ago and trusting Tony as little as the FBI did. Tony had barely responded to any of his direct questions, either answering enigmatically or not at all. Jack still couldn't make heads or tails of his actions. Some had been vouched for by Bill and Chloe, their extremity negated by the ultimate achievement of apprehending Dubaku and the CIP device. But everything after the White House had gotten hazy. Tony had insisted that the true people behind the attacks were yet to be apprehended and that he refused to allow the FBI's red tape to interfere. Jack hadn't argued, but then things had gotten chaotic at Starkwood. Just as Jack had gotten a moment alone with Tony, insisting on more context, Tony had knocked him out cold and left him. From there, it had been a mad dash for the FBI to stop him from detonating the remaining bioweapon canister on the subway. At that point, Jack had lost his remnant faith in Tony, not believing that his intentions could outweigh his actions. Tony had protested wildly during his arrest but was yet to actually come clean about anything, and that was what Jack was here to do now.

"Alright…" Renee conceded. "I'll be on the other side of the glass. Just give me a minute."

She seemed quite stressed, and understandably so since she had been running the FBI since Larry's death. But based on the clear hesitancy in her eyes, she wasn't about to let him do this on his own. Jack gave her the time she needed to check in on the other agents. The active threat had been downgraded, so it was really a matter of ensuring outstanding, high-priority tasks were completed before allowing people to finally clock off, many having been there for over twenty-four hours. In the meantime, Jack kept his eyes on the holding room where Tony was. Tony had been secured with great caution, so Jack would like to think he was fine but wouldn't make any assumptions. He couldn't assume anything about Tony anymore.

Finally, Renee met him outside with another agent holding polygraph equipment. They walked into the vestibule, and much like he had almost twenty-four hours ago, he simply stared at Tony, only this time, he wasn't desperately holding out for a reaction. No, Tony wouldn't say anything unless provoked, and Jack no longer cared about being nice or giving him the benefit of the doubt. Innocent people had died today, and many more had almost died, all as a result of his actions that, at this point, still lacked a clear cause. Sure, Tony had insisted it was about the conspiracy. But Jack didn't think he was doing this because he was a crazed vigilante; Jack might have helped him if that were the case. Then Tony must have known he wouldn't because why else would he have knocked him out? Tony had to have a personal gain here. Jack suspected Michelle was at least a good part of it. That wasn't far-fetched, given Tony's track record. But even then, Tony would have said so. Jack, of all people, understood the pain of losing someone they had loved so dearly. 

"All done," the agent said as he came back in, looking between him and Renee nervously. "I'll, uh, leave you guys to it."

"Thanks, Brenner," Renee replied, a small smile on her face.

He nodded, then exited.

Renee sighed, passing Jack the earpiece. "I'll be here to tell you his readings and, well, to make sure you don't kill him." She shrugged. "Rough him up, fine, but I hope I can at least trust you to keep him alive."

It was almost staggering to see how indifferent she was about forceful interrogation now. There was a coldness about her that had switched on after Larry's death but really had started forming after Rosa's. Although Jack was certainly happy to not have bureaucratic obstacles here, some part of him just panged at seeing Renee act like this. He still believed she was a ticking time bomb and that once she got home, she would face the reality of the day she had had. Jack had been in that place many times. He could only hope that Renee wouldn't shut out help. 

"I can't make any promises about not touching him, but I can promise you that."

She laughed through her nose, although just looking at Tony had made her expression sober again. "Good."

Jack walked in, and he couldn't help but feel deja vu at Tony's total lack of interest. Before, Tony had had a reason to stay silent: to piss Jack off enough that he would get up close and personal to hear the codeword. But Jack doubted there was an ulterior motive this time. No, Tony wasn't speaking because he somehow had a sense of self-importance. Only Tony could be handcuffed, facing either a life sentence — possibly the death penalty — and still act smug. Jack didn't believe it, though. This was not unlike the way he had acted after prison and his divorce, cold and bitter on the outside but aching and fragile underneath. Back then, Jack had tried earnestly to claw through Tony's walls and get him to open up but had failed. He was determined to succeed this time. As much as he wanted to act like this was solely about getting the truth for the sake of closure about today, he couldn't deny that, in some way, he was hoping to save Tony somehow, perhaps not from being reprimanded for his actions, but at least from himself. If there was a shred of the old Tony left inside the hollow, frigid man before him, he wanted to preserve it.

However, Jack wasn't going to play good cop here — did he ever? — and expect this to be some brotherly heart-to-heart. Brother. That word that Emerson had said just to make it clear how much Tony had depended on him while he had been gone for no fault of his own. If Tony considered Emerson a brother, then what the fuck was he? It wasn't like he had wanted to be absent. Had Henderson not tried to kill Tony that day, and had he not been imprisoned the moment he caught his breath, he would have supported Tony through his grief. He wouldn't have taken advantage of his malleability and tried to shape him into a new person. No, he would have been there for him the way Tony had after Teri. It killed Jack that he hadn't been there to make up for it. He felt like he owed it not just to Tony but to Michelle, too.

"Why?" Jack asked simply, leaning against the wall with folded arms. "You still haven't told me why."

Tony remained motionless, eyes staring blankly ahead.

"Why you killed Agent Moss, why you took the canister for yourself, why you kept withholding information like you don't trust me anymore… I could go on, Tony, but the only way I'm walking out of here is with closure. It's not like last time. There is no active threat. There is no reason for me to be here except my own need to understand what the hell you were doing."

Still, nothing — as if he would expect any less from arguably one of, if not the most stubborn person he had ever known. Jack wondered whether any of this was a conscious effort or if Tony was just so detached from his old self that being completely unreactive was easy for him to do now.

He could get physical; Renee had practically given him her blessing. But that would only make him feel better or feel productive if he was angry. He was angry. But it was overshadowed immensely by his despondency and perplexity. He felt helpless. It was like he was talking Tony down from a ledge and had nothing to say, nothing to incentivise him. Jack didn't want Tony to die. If he gave up even a little bit of information, that would be enough for Taylor to reduce it to a life sentence — most likely without parole. Tony barely handled seven months in prison — although he wasn't the person he had been back then. He would probably happily accept every charge, take a public defender, stay silent and not flinch even as the judge sentenced him. Jack wouldn't let that happen. A reasonable part of that was spite, wanting Tony to be punished for what he had done. But most of it was out of not bearing the thought of having to bury him — Jack would never tell him that, though.

Jack knew the card he had to play. Tony had had no problem playing it this morning with him; in fact, it was basically the only reason he had managed to drop the codeword. They each knew which buttons they had to push to get where they wanted. Really, they had been doing that since their CTU days. When they had agreed on something, they had run CTU effectively and been scarily in sync. When they had disagreed on something, God help them and everybody around them. Jack used to at least be able to play the I outrank you card in the early days. Tony had practically jumped at the chance to be able to use that in return after he got demoted. His short(er) fuse from grappling with his addiction hadn't helped, either.

"Do you think if Michelle could see you now, she'd be pleased that this…" Jack gestured around him. "Is your idea of honouring her?"

Tony didn't break, unsurprisingly, but Jack believed it was harder for him to keep his composure here. He wanted to, at least.

"I think his heart rate increased. A little," Renee informed him. The fact that she had started somewhat confident but then faltered made Jack believe she was probably searching for a tic because she pitied him.

"Come on, Tony, we both know that if she had any idea of what had happened today or in the last six years, she would be heartbroken. She would hate you," Jack spat, aware that as much as he wanted to weaponise Michelle here, he knew he would cross the line between her ideals and projecting his onto her. "She wouldn't even recognise you."

But Tony's self-worth was not something he cared about. Tony was well aware Michelle wouldn't be pleased with him. Nothing he had done had been for her approval then, so why would it be now? All Tony had ever done was martyr himself for Michelle because she was such a huge part of his heart, and he revered her in such an extreme way. Jack remembered seeing the way Tony lit up when he was around her, especially in the early days. That look had been Jack's first sign that Tony and Michelle were anything but casual, united by a sense of emotional intimacy that could only arise from such dire day-to-day conditions. It was why he had been so quick to push her away when things got hard, believing himself unworthy of being in her life. It was why he was trying to push her away from his thoughts here, knowing he had no excuses this time, nothing to say for himself.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jack said pleadingly. "Yes, I still would have tried to talk you out of this, but at the very least, I would have understood."

"That's just it, Jack," Tony then said, voice flat. "I didn't want to hear your sanctimonious bullshit about how it's not what Michelle would want and how it won't make me feel better. I'm never going to feel better, Jack, but at least this way, I feel like I've achieved something."

He scoffed. "What, Tony? Betraying almost everybody you've ever known today?"

His cheek twitched then. Jack wondered if he was thinking about Emerson. Even in his dying breaths, Emerson had been pretty damn cold towards Tony, not accepting his desperate apology.

"He definitely reacted to that," Renee validated.

"You told me helping the government was like spitting on Teri's grave," Jack went on, his voice rougher. "It's a far cry from what you've done today. You've disgraced Michelle and everything she ever worked for. I know you don't care about your life, but you damn well care about hers. She's never going to be remembered as the agent she was now because her memory is now tainted by your actions. Is that what you wanted?"

Now, Jack didn't even need Renee's commentary because he could visibly observe the faster rise and fall of Tony's chest.

"Tell me the truth. Tell me the truth, damn it!" Jack yelled, straightening his posture and coming to stand over him. "Getting revenge for Michelle was all you wanted? You were hurting so much that you needed to make the world hurt with you?"

"It was more than that," Tony said shortly. "I told you I needed to stop the people behind this conspiracy in my own way because they couldn't be reached conventionally."

"What– by proving that you could be a terrorist just like them?"

"Yes," Tony answered, making Jack furrow his brow. "Because the person I needed to get to wouldn't even get in the same room as me unless I proved I was worthy, a true believer in his patriotic cause."

Jack continued to look at him expectantly.

"The man behind everything that's happened today, and behind Charles Logan, is named Alan Wilson. He put the hit out on Michelle and me. Logan was just a puppet."

The idea that people had been influencing Logan was not unusual. Frankly, Logan was too stupid to have pulled off any of that on his own or even subscribe to such intense ideologies. He would have just gone along with whatever his associates told him to do, agreeing based on the assurance that things would stay secret and that his reputation could only benefit. But Jack believed that uncovering BXJ's involvement, among others, had been it. CTU had worked thoroughly that day, mostly Bill and Chloe, so why hadn't this come up earlier? Granted, the CIP device had been a priority, but still, he could have said this at any point during the day.

"So you didn't tell me because you correctly assumed I wouldn't let you kill innocent people?"

"I was trying to protect innocent people, Jack," Tony defended. "Taking out Alan Wilson was not just so I could get revenge; it was to put an end to the bullshit we've been dealing with for almost a decade. He was the start of it all. Killing him would have shattered his cabal. You know as well as I do, Jack, that these kinds of people don't do well without a leader. They're parasites."

He unfortunately agreed with the logic but still insisted there had to have been a better way. He wondered whether some of this was rooted in some need to feel superior to Tony, whether he could have easily ended up like him if he had been pushed that far. He and Tony weren't the same, though. Even if Jack had ended up in the path of someone like Emerson after losing Teri, he wouldn't have been so vulnerable to have been radicalised like that. But even then… a lot of this sounded like Tony, not Emerson.

"Alright, so you did this for Michelle, but you were still trying to take down the conspiracy members. That's it?"

Tony huffed. "Yes."

Then why didn't he feel satisfied? He had a marginally greater understanding of Tony's motives now, but it wasn't enough. Could it be that simple? That Tony didn't tell him everything because he didn't want to be stopped? It just couldn't be right.

"Jack, he's holding back," Renee informed him, and this time, Jack did believe the reaction was subconscious.

"You're still withholding," Jack said, making it very clear that he was not about to let this go any time soon, that he wouldn't cease this until he felt like he had succeeded in some way.

Tony clicked his tongue. "And you won't leave until you know everything, will you?" He looked up. "Tell me, Jack, why do you need answers so bad? What difference does it make? It won't change the outcome."

"No, but maybe if you work with me, you won't end up on death row. Believe me, I know that's what you want, Tony, but I won't let that happen. Humour me. Just tell me what the hell this was for. I don't even care anymore, Tony, I just need you to be honest with me. After everything we've been through today, I deserve the truth."

There was a pause before Tony said, "You know what the difference is between you and me, Jack? Every time you come back to CTU or the FBI or whoever else wants you, you let yourself get sucked back in, then act surprised when something bad happens, even though you know better."

Jack tried not to react too hard at that jab that somehow he had brought any of what he had been through on himself, because unfortunately, there was some truth to Tony's words. He had always tried earnestly to say no, yet always ended up back in a position that put himself or Kim at risk.

"But me… I tried to get out. I knew our only chance of being able to live without looking over our shoulders would come from getting out. We were happy. Everything was falling into place." Tony's cheek twitched, and Jack saw the veins in his hand bulge from tensing. "But then he took everything from me."

"I know you loved Michelle–"

"She was pregnant," Tony said quickly, his voice starkly different than before. His eyes were squeezed shut like he was fighting back tears.

Jack lowered his head to hear him better. "What?"

"She was pregnant," he repeated, one of those tears streaming down his cheek. "You wanted to know? Now you know. The only thing I wanted to achieve was killing the man who took my son away from me. But you got in the way, and now you're sitting here acting like you're doing me some kind of fucking favour."

He sighed, seeing how he was still trying to preserve some dignity by not completely losing it, but it was difficult given the day he had just had. However, Jack wasn't about to victimise Tony in anything today. He maintained his belief that Tony had gone too far, and having the opportunity to kill Wilson taken away from him was an apt punishment.

"Don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same for Kim," Tony then said in response to his silence.
 
He stiffened. "It's different–"

"What, Jack? If you're about to tell me it was different because I never got to meet my son, you're full of shit. You know damn well that you fell in love with Kim at that first sonogram, not the second you held her."

Jack slumped his shoulders. "I'm sorry," he said honestly. "I am. I… I understand. Teri…." He took a breath. "Teri was pregnant when she died, too."

Tony didn't say anything to that, proving even more that at least part of what he had said yesterday had been just to get him close.

"How far along was Michelle?" Jack asked, softer this time.

Tony sniffled. "Three months. We found out the sex of the baby the day prior. We had said since it was a boy, we would have named him after you — named after you, you son of a bitch."

Jack's heart clutched at that. He felt like right now, he was talking to the Tony he knew, recognising more than he had over the past twenty-four hours. It reminded Jack why he was here, why he hadn't walked away as much as he had intended to when Renee showed him the CCTV footage of Tony a day ago. This was the Tony he wanted to save, not the Tony he wanted to punish.

"Are you happy now?" Tony asked, clearing his throat. "You wanted the truth? You've got it. So, why don't you just leave?"

"What– so the next time I see you, it'll be in court when they sentence you? After that, you strapped to a gurney, ready to give up?"

He shrugged like it didn't matter. It did. He might not ever have the life he wanted, but that didn't mean he couldn't have one with meaning.

"Taylor won't give me anything less than life, you know that. Either way, I'm going to die in a federal prison. The difference is how long I have to wait."

Jack sighed. Tony had a point, and Jack couldn't blame him for wanting to put himself out of his misery, but Jack refused to let him. He felt like he was at a loss. He couldn't guilt Tony into doing anything; Tony flagellated himself enough anyway. Even then, what was he to do? Unless Tony wanted to be a snitch — and really, given his history as a federal agent, most inmates probably wouldn't want to be near him any more than last time — being in prison was not exactly going to make anything better. What Jack really wanted was for Tony to have a chance to redeem himself. But even then, redemption made sense for people who had gone down the wrong path, perhaps unintentionally, and needed guidance to realign themselves. Tony hadn't just made a simple mistake by falling in with the wrong crowd. He had used his years of knowledge to wreak havoc. Some of his intentions may have been for a greater purpose and exposing corruption, but most of it had really been out of grief. He wanted to believe that Tony could heal under the right circumstances. That gaping hole in his heart left behind would never close over, but he might be able to have another chance. That was just it, though: Tony didn't want one. He wasn't getting any younger. He had had enough of everything and just wanted it to be over.

"You don't have to keep trying, Jack," Tony said sadly. "I know you want to save me, but you don't have to."

"I'm not letting you die," Jack insisted. "You still have a play here. All this information on Wilson… maybe you can hand it in so the government will do something with it."

Tony scoffed. "The government won't do shit. If legally binding evidence existed, I wouldn't have had to do any of this."

Jack felt a great need to hold onto the fact that part of Tony's plans had been to expose corruption. He couldn't bring Michelle back, and no, trying to avenge her blindly and without care was not the way to go. But maybe Jack could cling to this part of Tony that aimed for the greater good. That was the Tony he could try to build up from the ashes because, contrary to his belief, that wasn't the Tony that had died in his arms.

"Would it matter to you if the government tried? If the government could use your evidence and get to Wilson somehow, would that make you feel better?"

Tony lifted a shoulder. He didn't seem too sure of himself, but the fact that the answer wasn't an outright no had to be a good sign. "If you want me to cut a deal, Jack… I don't know if I can live with more disappointment. I'm sure they'll try, but they'll never get to the bottom of it. Wilson will lawyer up, too."

"But you believe you could?" Jack then asked, making Tony furrow his brow.

"If I had another opportunity to prove myself to him, and he believed it, yes, I would like to think I could."

It was clear that proving himself was the conflicting part. The FBI could plan a sting operation, but could they make it look realistic enough that Wilson would believe it? Not likely, especially given that the FBI wasn't even running at capacity currently. Jack remembered this being a point of difficulty in the Salazar operation. It was why it had had to be so secret because even CTU wouldn't have approved of the potential collateral of breaking Salazar out of prison. It had been a struggle between three people, but they had pulled it off. He only had Tony here, possibly Renee, possibly Chloe, although he was quite sure she was on her flight home to LA, as she should be now. Renee probably wouldn't go for it, not without serious convincing and insurance that Tony was being upfront  — which, really, Jack still wasn't sure about. While Renee was more open-minded than Larry had been, it was still a lot to ask for. Most importantly, could they trust Tony to keep his cool and not kill Wilson at the first opportunity? 

But even if everything went well, what would change? Tony would feel slightly more satisfied, knowing that Wilson was detained and that the FBI was at least trying to look into him, but that would be it. They would be back here, debating between death and a life sentence unless Tony was offered a deal for further information. Did Tony want a deal, though? Could he really go back to being a Fed, even if he was more of a senior consultant than an agent? It was hard to picture in a shirt and slacks again. The buzzcut and cold expression were just too jarring. He was so far removed from the Tony he met at CTU and even from the Tony after prison. Far removed, but how far?

Maybe he couldn't figure this out alone. He might know Tony the best, but maybe there was something he was missing.

Jack walked back into the vestibule. Renee looked at him with surprise.

"What do you think?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. I'm not against trying out some kind of sting operation, but I don't have confidence in our ability to succeed right now, and… I- I still don't trust him." A flash of anger came into her expression, and Jack realised that she probably wasn't the impartial source he needed. "Even if everything went well… I don't know if Taylor would offer him a deal. It wasn't like he chose to turn himself in: he was stopped."

"I know, but… if Tony proved his intel was worthwhile, maybe Taylor will consider letting him consult on the investigation."

Renee sighed. "Well, you're still on her good side, so you might as well try. But, if you're asking me objectively… I'm not confident either way. If it wasn't for you being here, I'd be pretty damn happy seeing him executed, to be honest."

Jack wished Bill were here. Bill would have been a better sounding board and helped to plan an operation. But Bill wasn't here. Nobody who had known Tony nearly as long as he had was here, so this was his decision. Well, it was Tony's. If he was in the same position as Tony, he would be pretty pissed at anybody trying to negate his deathwish, too. He had been pretty close to shooting George on that plane all those years ago but ultimately caved only in the hope of mending his relationship with Kim. He couldn't quite make that argument with Tony. The only thing Tony had left was his own desire for redemption, both in terms of himself and how Michelle would perceive him hypothetically. Just thinking about Michelle again made Jack pause. She was Tony's weakness, and although he had certainly pressed Tony about her before, he hadn't done so as much as intended. Maybe, just maybe, he had been wrong to think that Tony didn't care what Michelle would think of him. No, perhaps at least some of this deathwish was rooted in shame, the fear of having to live with guilt and knowing how much she would hate him.

There was only one way to find out.

He grabbed Renee's gun off the table and walked back into the holding room. Renee protested, following him, but he ignored her as he placed the gun on the table in front of Tony.

"Here. You don't have to die in a federal prison. Go ahead."

Tony looked at the gun, then at him, bewildered and suspicious that Jack was giving in this easily.

"Jack, what the hell are you?–" Renee asked, but before she could try to take it, Tony had picked up the gun. Jack just held up his hand, stopping her from doing anything else.

This was a dangerous game, but Jack wouldn't be doing this if he didn't ultimately believe that Tony was bluffing. He flicked the safety off, pressing it to his temple and squeezing his eyes shut. His thumb hovered precariously over the trigger, and Jack tried not to pay attention to the small part of him that feared he was making a big mistake. Tony gripped the gun so tightly that his arm was trembling. He couldn't help but think of Chappelle, and it hurt, but he tried to put it out of his mind in favour of identifying hope in the fact that Tony was hesitating. If Tony wanted to kill himself out of spite, he would have by now.

Tony put the safety back on and slammed the gun on the table.

"Fuck you," Tony said, gritting through his teeth and not looking up.

Even though Jack had only tested Tony like this based on the firm belief that this was exactly how he would react, he couldn't deny the way his shoulders relaxed with relief. Renee seemed a little surprised by the outcome but still tried to maintain something of a stony facade, clearly not wanting to allow herself to feel any sympathy for Tony, for which he could not blame her. He might believe Tony had a chance at redemption, but part of that process would involve having to live with the guilt of his actions and face the people he had hurt. In a way, Jack was still trying to punish him. Trying to atone might be for Tony's own good, but the pain of it would also be a suitable punishment.

"You're doing the right thing," Jack said, his voice calmer than before. "It's going to hurt, but trying to be someone Michelle would be proud of is better than dying like a coward because you can't live with what you've done."

"I know," he agreed quietly after a beat, ashamed to have been exposed like this. Jack could only hope he would feel better eventually.

If there was one thing Jack knew for sure, though, it was that he was going to be there for Tony the way he wished he could have been all those years ago.