Tony didn’t know where he was going exactly, but something in his gut was nagging him to go to the basement level of CTU to figure it out. He hadn’t seen Nina for quite some time and was getting worried. It wasn’t like her to just disappear when things were still frantic. There’d been a shoot-out involving Jack. As if she had anything more important to do than to stay in the bullpen where Mason was still receiving updates. It was eerily quiet when he ventured down the hall and he cursed himself for not taking his gun with him. There were security guards everywhere, he had told himself, there was no reason to carry a gun in such a secure building, he had told himself, it was stupid, he had told himself. But now he felt like that wouldn’t have been such a bad idea. The only sounds he could hear were the gentle hums of the computer equipment. Nina couldn’t be down here, he decided.
As he turned to leave, he stopped in his tracks when he heard a sudden noise. It wasn’t very loud. In fact, Tony wondered if he’d just imagined it, maybe the air-conditioning kicking in or something. But that uneasiness in his gut returned. He walked to Tech 3, now seeing a petite shadow through the privacy glass of the door.
Why was she in here?
“Nina?”
She seemed so lost in her thoughts, gasping a little as she turned around to face him. The first thing he noticed was the gun in her hand, the silencer on the muzzle, and he realised exactly what he had heard just seconds ago. But as his eyes moved behind her, he saw another figure, slumped in a chair, a crimson stain on the wall behind them and pooling beneath them. Everything came together all at once. He saw a familiar pink jacket, a brown pixie cut, and fair skin and his mouth fell agape in horror. When he looked up, he saw Nina’s eyes piercing into his, the hand curled around the gun clenched.
Paralysed with shock, Tony couldn’t move. He went to speak, to shout, to say something to bring somebody else into this room, but instead jolted as a bullet whizzed right past his head, wedging itself in the doorway.
“Don’t move.” She said with a slight tremble to her voice. “Hands up. Now.”
He was so confused, he couldn’t understand why she had done such a thing. What reason did she have to kill Teri? Why go to all the trouble of helping Jack save her and Kim only to shoot her anyway? This made no sense. But right now he was unarmed with a gun pointed at his chest and didn’t want to take any chances. So slowly, he raised his hands, trying to find some kind of emotion, some kind of message in her eyes. They had seemed so cold when he’d faced her initially, but when she looked at him…there was worry, there was sorrow.
Almost as though she was apologising to him.
Maybe she didn’t mean to kill Teri, maybe she had no choice. Tony’s mind continued to search for answers, search for a reason, a simple, logical explanation for all of this. She wasn’t like this. Perhaps somebody was blackmailing or threatening her. Yes, that had to be it. After all, he’d seen Jack do the same thing today, act completely out of character all because something important was at stake.
Nina went to pull the trigger but found her index finger quivering. She saw nothing but fear in his eyes and her heart twinged. Killing Teri wasn’t something she’d enjoyed doing, but she’d had to. She’d seen too much. She would have exposed her to Jack immediately, and then it would have all been over. Tony technically didn’t know anything about that right now. But he did know that she’d committed a homicide. She couldn’t exactly let him go either. As much as working at CTU had been nothing but a means to an end, a place full of people to gain the trust of so she could get access to what she needed, Tony and Jack had both changed that. While ‘Nina Myers’ hadn’t been genuine, her love for them both, was.
However, Jack likely knew now what she was doing and who her ‘contacts’ had been. Her lie to him about Kim being dead was only to give her enough time to get out of CTU. But Teri had put that plan on hold. Now, it wouldn’t be long before he figured out that she’d killed Jamey, and when he got back to CTU, probably Teri too. He would never forgive her, no matter how much she tried to justify it, that it wasn’t personal.
But maybe Tony could.
Maybe he would understand.
And Nina realised at this moment that it wasn’t that she wouldn’t let him go, it was that she couldn’t. She couldn’t kill him. Not when he was looking at her like that. Not when the expression on his face was demanding nothing less than an explanation. Not when she could see that he wasn’t angry at her, per se, but he was angry at the situation. He was confused. He was upset.
Walking over towards Tony, keeping the gun trained on him, she saw him shake his head at her, not breaking eye contact. He wanted answers. He needed to know what the hell was going on. And she would tell him. But not here. The closer she got, the more intently she watched him. He wasn’t restrained by anything else except fear. But he wasn’t a civilian like Teri. All it would take is one swing and he could knock her off her feet easily, both from training and the size difference. It wasn’t like he hadn’t taken advantage of that before, albeit for much less ‘work-related’ purposes.
“K-Kneel down.” Nina felt tears prick the back of her eyes. She thought maybe by procrastinating the act that she would find it in herself to do it, find it in herself to silence him the way she did Teri. But she knew for sure now that she was wrong.
There was a slight hesitation, a slight twitch in his arms and she drove her knee into the back of his, forcing him into place. The silencer rested against the nape of his neck and with the short distance between them now, she could hear him gulp. He didn’t seem ready to move, he seemed too scared, or as though he knew what was coming and had decided not to fight it.
Just as he started to wonder what was taking so long, he felt something hard whack the back of his skull. He was unsteady on his knees, his vision suddenly blurry. His head throbbed but before he could even reach up to see if he could feel any blood, everything went black. The last thing Tony heard was a whispered apology, the voice soft and oh-so-familiar.
The first thing he noticed when he woke up was just how cold it was. CTU had been on the stuffy side, air-conditioning always desperate to keep up with the blazing Los Angeles heat. But Tony realised the last time he’d been this cold was Christmas when he’d visited his family in Chicago. He couldn’t possibly be there now, though. His eyes scanned his surroundings from his reclined position. Everything was moving quickly past him. The windows were clouded with white fog. Wherever he was, it was snowing. So definitely not Los Angeles. He craned his neck to figure out where he was but found himself unable to move. His wrists were bound, and so were his ankles. Tony realised the pressure on his mouth was from duct tape. His groan of discomfort came out muffled. His head was still spinning. He felt sluggish, more tired than he ever thought possible.
“Nearly there…” A woman’s voice sounded.
Tony shut his eyes again.
When he woke, it was dark, save for a small lamp in the corner. Everything was still, he certainly wasn’t in the car anymore. He felt much less tired than before but still had no idea just how much time had passed. Tony tried to sit up, but again found himself stopped. He wasn’t quite as restricted as before, but his wrists were still cuffed in front of him beneath a blanket. Slowly, he tried to sit up, letting the blanket fall into his lap. He felt sore all over, but the back of his head hurt most of all. His eyes flitted to a shadow in the corner of the room.
“It’s just me, Tony.” She said, turning the light on. “How’s your head? I can get you some ice if it still hurts.”
Memories flooded back to him as Nina appeared closer, her eyes concerned and soft. She wasn’t in her work skirt and shirt, having swapped for a comfortable-looking jumper and jeans. But he remembered seeing her with a gun in her hands, the body behind her, the blood all over the floor. He remembered his stomach turning, he remembered feeling shocked, betrayed even. Why had she killed Teri? But the more important issue right now was why hadn’t she killed him?
And where exactly were they?
“What’s going on, Nina?” He said, firmly. “Where are we?”
“Canada." She smiled. "Mexico would have been quicker but you always did prefer the cold.”
“Wha-”
“I’ll explain. Just…don’t be afraid. I only did what I had to do.”
“You killed Teri.” He said bluntly. “After everything that Jack went through to get her back. Why?”
Nina bit her lip. “She…she saw too much.”
“What exactly were you doing down there in the first place? You’d disappeared so suddenly at such a critical time.”
She sighed. She would have to tell him. She only hoped he would listen to the end, that he would understand.
“I…I was never really working for CTU. Just like Jamey wasn’t.”
His eyes widened. “So…so she wasn’t the only one giving up information. You were too? You lied-”
“It wasn’t like that-”
“You betrayed everybody you work with, you betrayed your country, you betrayed Jack, betrayed me.” Tony’s voice was already furious.
“Fine, Tony. I did. I sold our information and helped the Drazens orchestrate the hit on Palmer. Jamey was in on it with me.” Her voice started to shake. “But you have to believe me, I had no idea that Jack’s family was going to get involved. Killing Jamey wasn’t part of the plan either.”
He looked surprised again. “I-I thought she-”
“She knew I was planning to escape with the money that our superiors wanted. I-I couldn’t let her tell them. So trust me when I say, that if I hadn’t killed Teri, somebody else would have. The people I worked for were more dangerous than I’d realised. That’s why I was trying to get out of CTU. I was going to tell you everything, but when you found me I…I had to act quickly.”
Tony couldn’t process what was happening in front of him. Nina was confessing to such horrible crimes, was talking about killing Teri like it had come so easily to her. And it scared him. He’d only seen her hold a gun in training a handful of times, it made no sense for her to be such a naturally-inclined killer. He felt like he didn’t know her at all. But seeing how upset she was with her actions was messing with his head. It reminded him of the Nina he thought he did know. But what was he supposed to believe? If CTU meant nothing to her, then surely what they’d had didn't either.
“So you used me. I was nothing more than a means to an end for you to get information out of CTU.”
“No.” She said vehemently. “The minute I met you, I realised my plans had to change. Of course, I still had to get out of CTU and probably America eventually. But I knew I needed you to be with me. I couldn’t leave you behind. Jack would never forgive me if I told him what I’m telling you, he values honour and trust too much. But I know you’re more open-minded, I know that what we have is special and that you wouldn’t want to lose that.”
“Which is why you didn’t kill me.” He said quietly, realising that maybe that part of her was real, that if she hadn’t hesitated to kill Teri but had with him, then that had to mean something. But she’d still effectively kidnapped him, that wasn’t exactly nothing. And still, the image of Teri’s bloodied body was not going to leave his mind any time soon. “CTU isn’t exactly going to let ‘kidnapping a federal agent’ go, Nina. What the hell is your plan, here?”
Nina grimaced.
“What?”
“They don’t think I kidnapped you, Tony. From what I gathered of the reports, they…they think you’re my accomplice.”
He sighed. It was all just too much for him. He couldn’t even begin to try and figure out the implications of that or plan some kind of escape.
“So I’m stuck with you.”
Her eyes fell to the floor. “Look, I…I understand this isn’t easy for you to process. But I want you to know Tony that I care about you. That I did this for us, that I’m not evil, I was just caught up with the wrong people. In the beginning, it was just for money. I-I didn’t have the easiest life growing up, you know that. I made some stupid decisions when I was young and by the time I realised I was way over my head, it was too late. I had to do whatever I could to stay alive. And if that meant taking somebody else’s…look, it upsets me, of course it does. But I didn’t have a choice.”
“Just…just give me some time alone.”
She shrugged. “Okay, I’ll get some lunch for both of us in the meantime. But for now…” Nina took the key from her pocket, unlocking the cuffs to his surprise. The insides of his wrists were pink and tender and she frowned. “Don’t get too excited. The doors and windows are still locked.”
He was still staring despondently into space as she shut the door, feeling tears well in her eyes.
The first thing he’d tried to think of was an escape plan. But Nina knew him too well, she would easily be ten steps ahead of him already. Even if he did somehow make it back to CTU and try to explain his side of the story, would anybody really believe him? It wasn’t exactly unknown that he and Nina were seeing each other, they surely wouldn’t believe his claim of innocence. And although there were cameras in and around Tech 3, Nina would have wiped them without a doubt.
As hard as it was to admit, she was right.
She’d seemed so distraught, so ashamed when she’d revealed everything. As though what might have started as an under-the-table deal here or there to get by had simply erupted into something she couldn’t control, couldn’t escape from. And the fact that she’d spared him still stuck out prominently in his mind. If she was a cold-blooded killer, if she had no regret, no guilt over taking an innocent life, then he would have been dead next to Teri, he knew that. Maybe he could find a way to look past that, not that he ever treated death lightly, and of course, he couldn’t even imagine what Jack and Kim were going through right now. But maybe Nina really was in danger, and maybe that had been her panicked reaction to keep herself safe. Or, as she’d suggested, Jack’s family too.
Eventually, after trying to make some kind of definite opinion of her, Tony decided he couldn’t, and exited the small bedroom. The house they were in looked cozy, he had to admit. It was creeping into the middle of the day now, but the snowy surroundings outside made it look much later. He’d been to Canada once or twice for work, but never this far out into the country. It was all quite idyllic. Tony just wished he was here as a vacationer, not a fugitive.
Nina smiled as she turned to face him. “Food's ready.”
He kept his face even, not wanting to let his expression give her any indication that he was on board with her, that he felt one way or another. All that time he’d been trying to assess her character as a person, figure out if she was trustworthy in the general sense. His opinion about where they stood as a couple was a whole other thing to unravel.
Neither of them spoke while they ate. Nina tried to look up at him for some kind of tell, but found nothing there.
“I always wanted to take you here.” She started, speaking quietly. “Even before I knew where I’d be running to, I’d wanted us to have this as a vacation house.”
“So you wanted to buy my love.”
“Tony-”
“Nina, you might have spared my life, but I’m going to have to process this.”
She looked away. “I don’t care if I have to say it a million times, I was always planning on taking you with me.”
“To do what?” He said in disbelief. “Sit alone in a house worried that the police will break down the door?”
“I have IDs for both of us. I have enough money for us to travel, for us to do whatever we want to. I know you always had bigger dreams than CTU, I know joining the military was just a way to please your parents.” She grabbed his hand on the table fiercely. “And I’m telling you we can make this happen. When it was just me, I didn’t care, I was willing to let myself find other work and fall into that cycle again because I had nobody to lose. But now I’m doing this for us. So we can be happy.”
He looked down at her hand and then at her. There was so much passion, so much, dare he say it, love, in her voice. Was this really the truth? Could he honestly believe that she had it in her, that she cared enough for him to risk it all just so they could run away together? She didn’t have to drag him along like this. Really, if she was looking out for her best interests, being alone was the way to go. Finding two people together was somewhat harder than finding just one. While two people could protect each other, two people also meant two trails.
Tony thought about Jack. Thought about how betrayed he must feel right now. Thought about him having to find Teri’s body. Thought about Kim. That image was not going to be something to forget so soon.
None of this was an easy decision to make, if one could call it that. Nina had done so much for him, they’d been good for each other, they’d cared for each other. And that was exactly what she was doing now, caring for him. But at what cost? She’d killed Jamey and Teri, and God knows who else in her escape from CTU. She’d leaked information that could threaten national security, threaten the lives of unnamed innocent people.
Nina had prioritised them both over anybody else. He couldn’t ignore that.
But he couldn’t ignore the fact that she’d betrayed CTU either.
“I still need to think about this.” He said, clearing his plate and making his way back to the bedroom. Tony paused. “Thanks for…not killing me. You could have, probably should have, but you didn’t, so…obviously, there’s some truth to all this.”
Before she could respond, he walked back into the bedroom, shutting the door.
She understood this was going to be hard for him. She never wanted him to see that side of her or think she was evil. But really, that was always going to be a part of being on the run. He would have had to see her do something of the sort eventually.
However, Nina noticed his voice was a little softer and instantly felt relieved. Maybe he was finally getting the picture. That she’d simply been backed into a corner and done what she needed to do so that they could have the lives they wanted.
Otherwise, she didn’t know what to do.
Because her plans for them to be happy together only work if he trusts her.
They’d had to go shopping for food. He still felt so weird about being out, like someone could catch them at any minute. That he’d turn around and a cop would be pointing a gun at him. She’d at least given him a pistol, although, being in Canada meant that conceal-carrying wasn’t going to work. If anybody spotted them, it’d be like having targets on their backs. So for now, he was waiting outside for her to pay, keeping watch just in case, with one hand resting on the knife in his back pocket.
It had been a while though. He knew she was always on the adventurous side with food shopping, always finding new recipes for them to try together. It made him nostalgic to think about it, all the little late-night dinner dates they’d had at each other’s apartments since they never finished work at an hour when anything was open aside from McDonald’s. But something told him to go in and check. Maybe she was just struggling with bags or there was a long line-up.
Tony stepped through the automatic doors, noticing that the convenience store was quiet. He paced through the aisles slowly, knowing she wasn’t exactly tall enough to be seen from afar. The uncertainty in his gut grew, and if he’d learnt anything from last time, it was that it wasn’t to be ignored. There was a small bathroom at the back, probably leading to some side alley outside. Tony called out for her, unable to mask the fear in his voice now. He was worried about her. After all, if she was in danger, then so was he.
Stepping out, he felt the cool breeze on his skin, immediately whipping his head around at the sound of a muffled cry. She was being held against the wall, a strong grip around her throat, a paper bag by her feet, its contents spilled onto the concrete. Her legs were flailing desperately as she tried to kick the people holding her. The attackers looked strong, one of them yelling at her about money, the other, with his hand trailing up her thigh seeming to have other plans.
Instinctively, he felt around for his gun but realised that attacking from a distance wasn’t going to work in this case. His eyes met hers as he quietly drew closer. In one swift motion, he drove the knife into the back of one, throwing a punch as he tried to turn around. By the time the other one realised what was going on, Nina had already kicked him between the legs, letting Tony plunge the knife into his chest. He yanked it out quickly, knowing the man would bleed out that much faster, not giving him a chance to try anything again.
Nina gasped as the hold on her throat was released, her knees wobbling. Tony was quick to take her into his arms, feeling the race of her heart against his chest, feeling her shake.
“You’re okay…” He whispered.
“T-they took me from behind, I couldn’t get to the knife.”
He pulled back, thumbing his cheek over the redness on her throat. “Who were they? Were they the people you worked for? Are we in danger?”
“No, I didn’t recognise them at all.”
Tony felt relieved at that, glad she was okay, but also that it wasn’t intentional. He cursed himself for somehow not seeing the two men enter the store. It hit him now just how important protecting her had been. How he hadn’t even had to think before he’d saved her and taken her in his arms. Had it really only been a few weeks since they’d been at CTU, since he’d looked at her with such concern, kissed her neck, and reassured her that she would be okay?
“Okay…we need to get out of here quickly.” He fished the car keys from his pocket, passing them to her. “I’ll clean up and take care of everything here, I’m sure we’ll be able to access their cameras and wipe them when we get back. For now, go wait in the car, and lock the doors.”
She nodded fervidly, running back to the car. When Nina got to the dark pick-up, truck, she was quick to do as Tony had said, eyes still skittishly looking at her surroundings. Somehow this was more terrifying than anything she could have expected. If it had been the people she worked for, she would have been prepared, that was something she knew was always a likely scenario. But being attacked at random, simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time, was something she couldn’t plan for. Tony hadn’t hesitated in saving her. Really, if he wanted to, if he really despised her and the situation she’d forced him into, he could have left her. But he didn’t. He was loyal to her, even though she had been untruthful to him. And she was so grateful, so honoured by that fact. Neither of them had said “I love you” yet, but she was pretty sure she would have by now if things were still normal. And she hoped he felt the same.
Tony looked exhausted by the time he came to join her, wordlessly taking the wheel, one hand on her knee. They were silent on the ride home, Tony knowing that he wouldn’t be able to comfort or assure her properly without being able to look at her face-to-face. Everything had happened so quickly it was hard to believe it had only been an hour or so. Cleaning a crime scene wasn’t exactly foreign territory for him. He’d had to do it for covert missions before, covering up scenes or making them look different than they actually appeared. Although he usually had at least one person helping him. Nina would have probably sped the process up, but on the off-chance her memory was playing up and these people were after her specifically, he couldn’t add another layer of stress to what she was already going through. Tony stopped himself when he realised this, realised how much he was thinking of her, how concerned he was about her. At first, he thought it was simply because her safety and her ability to stay hidden directly affected him. But Tony understood that that wasn’t the case. He accepted now that he did care about her.
He parked the truck in their driveway, neither of them moving when the engine died down.
“You saved my life…” She said, quietly.
Slowly, he reached out to touch her shoulder, bringing her to look at him. His eyes were teeming with concern.
“Yes. And I would do it again, no matter what.”
Her eyes widened.
“Processing this hasn’t been easy, I keep finding myself stuck between these two versions of you, trying to make these concrete decisions about whether you’re a good or a bad person, whether I can trust you, how I truly feel about you. All you’ve told me since we arrived here was that you hadn’t changed, that you were the same person I knew.” He took in a breath. “A-and I think I’m starting to believe it now. That you’re not evil, you’re just doing what you have to do to stay alive, you’re looking out for yourself first because I know you’ve told me that you never really had anybody to do that for you.”
“I’m sorry for putting you through this. I always intended on giving you the choice to come with me, but at that moment I knew I couldn’t lose you.”
“And I understand that now. Because I had that same moment today. I could have taken the opportunity to run back to America and make my case, but I didn’t. I saved you without even thinking about it. I cleaned everything up to avoid you, to avoid both of us being found. No matter how hard I try to think otherwise, what we had, what we still have, is worth fighting for. Things won’t be perfect, maybe I won’t be capable of forgiving everything just yet, but I want to try.”
She was speechless, so surprised, so relieved to finally hear the words come out of his mouth. There was no doubting the honesty in his voice. He was still loyal to her, he still cared, and that was all she needed to know. That he wasn’t going to abandon what they had. What surprised Nina more, however, was his head leaning in towards her, eyes shut. Their lips met softly, the hand that was on her shoulder moving up to cup her cheek. His stubble was rough against her skin. She’d meant to buy razors today, not that she didn’t mind the look on him, but she knew he’d probably want to keep it tamed before it grew too long.
When he pulled back, with one hand still on her face, not wanting to let go of her, he went to speak but stopped himself. Squeezing his eyes shut, he shook his head. “I-I love you. I wanted to say that before all of this happened but I kept chickening out. And even though things are different now, you might have done some things that I can’t love, that I can’t condone, but I still love you.”
“I love you too.” She whispered, unable to contain the smile on her face as she pulled him in for a hug.
“I think that’s everything, but I’ll check the back of the truck anyway.” Tony said, setting down another grocery bag. They’d found a much larger, much more well-lit grocery store and stocked up on essential items, but they hadn't been afraid to splurge on some delicacies they’d missed. It had been fun, so reminiscent of old times. Nina had explained that before helping the Drazens, most of her money had come from less devious actions. Palmer had been the first and last, she promised, assassination job. Taking an innocent life, especially one that promised to do good things for the country hadn’t sat right. What she’d done previously hadn’t directly impacted anyone, but this had been different.
She knew that the more she told Tony, the more he’d be able to trust her. They weren’t all the way there yet. In fact, she was sure it would be a long time before he would stop asking questions, stop circling, stop mulling over everything alone in the darkness. Sharing a bed again hadn’t happened yet, which she respected. Although the kisses and hugs had seeped back into their day-to-day life, just a little. It wasn’t quite consistent. There were still some days where he’d spend the whole day away from her other than meal times. But if he was in a good mood, which was more often than usual since he had no CTU work to stress over, then she was a glad recipient of his affection.
Nina followed him outside, admiring the snow falling gently on the ground. She wasn’t sure how long they’d be staying in Canada, but she hoped they’d be able to enjoy this for a little longer. Most of the other locations that were easy to flee to were generally hot and tropical. Tony inspected for more bags but nodded, satisfied, walking back empty-handed. A thought occurred to her, and she smiled brazenly. Bending down, Nina grabbed a handful of the snow and walked a little closer to him. He didn’t even notice she was there until the ball hit him square in the chest.
He smirked, but before he could attempt to retaliate, she hit him again.
“You’re gonna regret that.”
She could only laugh when his snowball hit her solar plexus. They continued to pelt snowballs at each other. It reminded her so sweetly of the paintball fights they’d have in CTU training. Eventually Tony decided to end it by tackling her into a large pile of snow. Icy particles scattered all over their dark coats and hair. She spluttered at the coldness of the water on her lips, squirming as he kissed below her ear lobe. Suddenly, he heard a small whimper. He pulled back, looking at her intently.
“I didn’t hit you that hard, did I?”
“What?”
The whimper sounded again. Nina furrowed her brow, giving him an equally confused look.
“We’re the only house out here for miles. What could that possibly be?”
“I don’t know.” Tony stood, offering a hand to help her up. Together they warily moved around the perimeter of the house. They weren't too worried, mainly curious. It certainly didn’t sound like a menacing intruder. As they neared the back, they found the mewl was growing louder and more impatient. Tony ducked, looking under the elevated base of the house, tilting his head.
He laughed. “I think we’ve got a little visitor.” Moving so she could see, Tony revealed a small dog, shivering in the shadows beneath.
“Oh, the poor thing looks so cold.” Her voice softened.
Tony cooed to the dog until it mustered the courage to run forward into his arms. Immediately, he held it to his chest, hoping his body was warm enough. Nina smiled, brushing some of the excess snow off the top of its head, noticing the mixture of dark brown and black fur beneath. It sneezed and she pursed her lips. They took it inside, quickly swaddling it in a small blanket and brushing it as best they could.
“Does it have any tags?” Nina asked. “Dogs can be chipped, so we better be careful.”
He lifted it higher, looking at the underside of the dog’s body as it writhed in his grip. “He doesn’t seem to belong to anybody. Although I’m not sure we can check for chips without hurting him.”
She bit her lip in thought before getting up to go to another room and returning with a small device. Nina held it close to the dog as it moved in Tony’s lap, listening to it beep rhythmically.
“Metal detector?”
“Yeah. If it doesn’t scream, hopefully, he’s not being tracked. I would hate to have to just dump him at a shelter.” To her relief, the machine didn’t seem to react to any part of his body. “We’re all good, I think.”
Tony seemed pleased at that, with the look of pure joy on his face warming her heart. He was already so attached, murmuring to the dog under his breath. She knew that he loved dogs. He'd always complained that he couldn’t have one for as long as he worked at CTU. He would never be home enough to take care of it, and the thought of a dog alone in his small apartment would sadden him. In fact, she was pretty sure the last time he’d actually had a dog of his own was when he was a teenager and still living at home. So this seemed like a fitting start to their new lives together. And judging by the unrestrained smile on Tony’s face, Nina had a feeling that he felt the same way, that maybe an escape plan at the back of his mind wasn’t quite such a worry anymore.
“We’ll have to buy him some supplies, but given how scrawny is, I’m sure a few days on our food can’t hurt.” She laughed through her nose, letting him nibble at her finger. “What are we naming him?”
He narrowed his eyes at the dog, going through countless names in his head. All of the typical German shepherd police dogs at CTU came to mind. They usually had names in the form of weapons. He couldn’t exactly tell what breed this dog was, it just looked like a total mix. But a mean, fierce name didn’t suit him. Something simple, something sweet, would suffice.
“How about Chip? A little ironic since we’ve just figured out he doesn’t have any but…”
Nina nodded, scratching behind the dog’s ears. “No, I like it. Chip it is.”
It had been so easy, letting himself push down the memories of that day, letting himself take all the information she was giving him about her past, the truths of her motives and actions and gently allowing it to slip to the back of his mind. But when Tony calculated that it had been exactly three months since the death of Teri Bauer, since the death of Jamey Farrell, since the attempt on Palmer’s life, since his world had been turned upside down, his gradual progress and acceptance stilled. They had a routine by this point, normally some combination of cooking, doing maintenance checks that nobody was tracking them, and playing with the dog. It was blissful, it was calm. They’d even managed to find a bookstore selling dozens of second-hand books and DVDs. Being happy and letting go seemed so tempting. But Tony still resisted.
He’d been restless at night. Really, he hadn’t slept well since they’d gotten there, unable to trust his surroundings enough to let himself surrender to his fatigue. But over the last few days, he hadn’t been able to sleep for different reasons. Every time he shut his eyes, he was back at CTU, back in Tech 3, walking in to find Nina over and over again. His mind would change the vision each time, sometimes finding Kim, or Jack, or Jamey, or Mason, or somebody else. He still couldn’t get over the fact that she’d looked at a human being and considered them disposable. He wondered whether she would have easily done the same to him if it wasn’t for the fact that they were more than friends. And no matter how much she said that she did it all for the both of them, more specifically did it for him, it only made him feel more conflicted. She had planned her escape with him in mind, she had thought about his happiness, how although he didn’t mind working at CTU, there were other things that would fulfil his passions more. But to go so far as to kill anybody who stood in her way, scared him. Scared him because if either of their feelings changed over time, he was sure she wouldn’t hesitate in conveniently getting rid of him too.
What he didn’t like most of all was the lack of choice, the lack of freedom. Sure, they had nobody to report to, nothing to do except whatever they wanted. But he hadn’t had the chance to think about whether this was the life he wanted until it was forced upon him. He tried to think about what he’d be doing if that day hadn’t happened. Probably back at CTU, staring at a computer screen. The job had been good at first, something he enjoyed, something he felt proud to be doing. But it was never really what he wanted. The thought of doing that work, or something similar, for the rest of his adult life, terrified him. Being on the run for the rest of his life did too, but there was a sense of excitement to it as well. Never entirely locked into one place, one identity, they could do what they wanted and if they didn’t like it, change in a heartbeat. He didn’t hate the idea of that. But part of him still felt selfish, still felt guilty that he was living such a carefree lifestyle while Jack, Kim, and so many others were mourning, were suffering. It wasn’t his fault, but still a small part of him nagged that by living with Nina, by staying with her, by trying to ignore it for his own benefit, he was no better. She was trying to forget about it too. He knew she didn’t consider it ‘nothing’, but she seemed far less bothered by it than he did, and he didn’t like it.
Not able to fall back asleep, Tony got up to pace around the house, watching the snow fall gently outside. His lips upturned at the sight of Chip curled up in the dog bed. He walked into Nina’s room, sighing. She was sleeping peacefully. He’d seen it so many times before and he couldn’t help but fall in love with her every time. He remembered always being awake just before she was and revelling in being able to simply watch her. And when her blue eyes would flutter open, she would smile and bring him towards her. Why couldn’t he just have that back? Why couldn’t he just let himself have that back?
She stirred suddenly, waking up to find him hovering over her.
“Tony?”
His mind had been racing, thinking, deciding, but now all he could do was look back at her.
‘What are you doing in here?”
“I…” He sighed, sitting on the bed cross-legged in front of her. “I just don’t know what to do anymore.”
Even in the dim lighting from the night sky outside, she could see how much anguish was in his expression. She could see how much he was trying to work through this for her, and it was killing her. He knew she hadn’t intended it to fall out this way, they’d gotten that far. But what made this hard, was the fact that he was so loyal, always so true to his beliefs.
“I mean, I can…” She started, quietly, sitting up. “I think if I sorted something out, maybe I could get you back to America safely, maybe I could give them testimony or something so CTU knows you weren’t part of what I did.”
“But I don’t want that. I don’t want to leave you. At first, I didn’t want to do any of this, I thought I’d wait until I had the opportunity to run, but what would I be coming back to? Look, as soon as I saw what happened to Jack’s family, I started wondering whether CTU was the right thing for me. When I was on my own, I didn't care. But as soon as I thought about losing you like that, it killed me. I-I’m still choosing you.”
Nina raised her eyebrows, surprised.
“I-I just want to stop feeling so conflicted. I want to go back to enjoying being with you. I want to enjoy the fact that I’m in the middle of nowhere, freezing my ass off, and I can’t even be mad because I’m with you.”
Her heart melted at that.
“But every time I try to feel happy, I feel guilty, because I think about what’s been sacrificed to get us here. It makes me feel like I’m a bad person. Like I don’t deserve to be happy. And what’s happened can’t be undone, there’s no time machine, there’s no fix.”
“What if there was? Maybe I can’t undo what I’ve done but…what if I at least tried to create some good to counteract it?”
He tilted his head at her.
“I’m talking about…still having meaning in our lives. I’m not talking about serving some government or organisation, I’m not talking about redemption so you can forgive me for everything and ignore what’s happened, this isn’t for me. I’m talking about trying to do good things and being better from now on.” She slowly moved her hand to touch his and he met her eyes. “If we see something that isn’t right, if we smell corruption, deceit, things that the government isn’t necessarily going to be able to pick up or stop, we do something about it. Not for their sake, but for ours. So we feel good. Like we’ve made an impact.”
“But…but I thought it didn’t matter to you. Y-you had sold information, why…why are you saying this?”
“Your window is running out, Tony, the longer we’re out here, the harder it’ll be to justify that you were innocent in all of this. But if you’re honestly saying that you want to try and make it work, then I want to do everything I can to make it easier for you. So if it means a slight change in plans and trying to do things like this because it’s important for you, then I’m okay with that. I took away your choice in all of this, the least I can do is make you happy. So…would that be enough?”
Tony took a moment to ponder what she was suggesting. It was still this ‘runaway’ lifestyle, it was still committing to well, not committing to anything. They were all each other had now. And he didn’t want to lose that, he knew that was more important than anything else. He knew that he loved her. And the fact that she was trying to accommodate their lifestyle to ease his guilt, the fact that she was aware of that and not trying to tell him to ignore it, not trying to push it down and pretend everything was okay, was surely a sign that she loved him too.
“Yeah…yeah, I think we can make that work.”
Nina sighed with relief, leaning forward to hug him. To her delight, he returned it, burying his head in the crook of her neck and kissing her. She placed a finger under his chin, so he could move up to meet her lips. He smiled against her, letting his hands slowly graze down her sides. They made out softly, finding ease, finding peace, finding contentment. Together, they fell to their sides, inching over closer to each other, slowly stilling their movements.
“So...I take it my bed is now our bed again?” She said coyly.
He nodded, pulling her in tighter, not wanting to let her go, to let this, go.
About six months had passed since they’d left CTU, and Tony’s life had been flipped upside down. But they’d made it work. They’d made something of themselves. They’d made a life that both of them could be content with. Nobody to answer to, nobody to steal credit, nobody to ignore them. When they saw something that didn’t seem right, they did something about it. But they didn’t make it their entire focal point. Their life out here was still about loving each other, enjoying each other's company, and enjoying freedom.
He sat across from her, sipping his coffee, watching as she adjusted the radio. They had it set to the frequency of the local police force. Considering they’d both worked at CTU once upon a time, finding this frequency hadn’t been particularly difficult. This was something they did usually at least once every couple of days to give them peace of mind. They would know if the police were on high alert in the area, even if it wasn’t for them, so they could time their outings better. As usual, they heard nothing but simple codes, which from experience, they knew usually related to minor incidents, everyday things. Occasionally there’d be a 911 call that got dialled through, perhaps for a robbery or a mugging. But nothing so far on the level where their presence out and about could cost them. The snowy weather meant the reception wasn’t always great, but they’d gotten used to the static. It became background noise for them, their instincts only kicking in when something sounded off.
A call came into the police station, the voice seemingly belonging to a young woman. They paid it no mind at first, although Nina swore it sounded a little familiar.
“Oh my God…” She said suddenly.
“What?”
“Something about that voice…”
Tony continued to listen in. The girl sounded quite distressed.
“P-please. H-he’s killed his wife, I-I’m hiding with his daughter in the closet. He hit her.” She gasped desperately. “I-I think he might kill me too.”
“Okay…we can send a team there right away.” The clerk said. “What’s the address?”
Tony squinted at her. “I…I can’t place it, but I swear I’ve heard her before too.”
Nina’s brow was still furrowed in thought.
The clerk’s voice suddenly became angry. “Are you aware that false alarms are a criminal offence, kid?”
“What?”
“You’re trying to accuse Sergeant Gary Matheson of murder and assault? After all of his years of service, you expect us to believe some stranger’s accusations of violence? Violence against his own family that we’ve known for years?”
Nina and Tony met each other’s gaze, surprised.
“Please, you have to believe me. I-I have no reason to make this up.”
“I’m going to let you off with a warning, kid, but I’m ending this call now. You doing this is stopping people with real emergencies getting through, understand?”
“No, don-!”
As the usual humdrum of everyday police chatter returned, they sat there in stunned silence.
“Bastards…” Tony muttered. “Even if she’s making accusations about one of their own, couldn’t they tell from the sound of her voice that she was scared? It’s the middle of the day. This can't be some sleepover prank. She was probably telling the truth!”
Nina shrugged. “We don’t have enough information to go on. But this is going to eat at me all day. I just know I’ve heard her before.”
Tony nodded, a worried look on his face. They carried on with the rest of their morning, silently agreeing not to leave, on the off-chance the mystery voice called the police again. There was a shared gut feeling that something about this person was important, that they should find out everything they could.
About half an hour later, they found their suspicions to be true. The same clerk spoke up, an annoyed tone present in her voice again.
“Ugh, it’s that girl again, trying to say Gary’s some kind of maniac.”
“What’s her name? We can file charges.”
She hummed for a bit. “911 dispatcher’s saying her name is Kimberly Bauer.”
Raising his eyebrows, Tony quickly rotated the volume dial.
“What do I do about the call?”
“Just tell the operator that it’s a prank and redirect it back to them.”
“That…that has to be the same Kim Bauer we know, right? I mean I get that it’s not an uncommon name, and why she’s in Canada is beyond me, but you and I both know we’ve heard the voice before. We…we have to do something.” Tony said, shocked again and now panicked that they had been ignoring the call. “We have to go help her.”
Her eyes widened. “How? I-I mean I want to help too but-”
“No, Nina, we can’t leave this one alone. This, this, finding Kim and making sure she’s safe is possibly the one thing that could make me really forget about everything that’s happened for good.” He hardened his voice. “And I know you feel the same way. I know you never wanted to betray Jack. So we need to do this.”
Nina nodded. “Then we make sure we know what we’re getting into. We do as much as we can here, figure out what’s happened, make sure she’s safe, and then we disappear.”
The first thing they did was check her file, finding that she was indeed working in Canada for a French au pair company. Her address did seem to align with that of local sergeant Gary Matheson.
Tony then got ready to go, wearing his bulletproof vest and packing the couple of guns she had brought with them, along with knives, and his burner phone. But he could still see how nervous Nina was. Not that she was hesitant, not that she didn’t want to do something about it, but that she was too scared to. Every other good deed they’d tried to do had been from afar, had been covert, something that didn’t put them at risk. But this was different. She would recognise her and Tony instantly. Then it would only be a matter of time before she called Jack, who would call CTU, who would find out exactly where they were. He understood that. Of course, he did, he was scared too. But he knew they had to do this. He placed a hand on her shoulder.
“It’s going to be fine, okay? She won’t have to know it’s us. We’ll be in and out.” Tony said reassuringly.
“Wait, I just realised something.” Nina said, clasping her hand over his. “If we do this, if we save her and then run off…she’ll have to give a statement about what happened. If they don’t believe her now…she could get in big trouble for this if they think she’s lying about the whole thing. The police need to see what this guy is doing. It’s the only way they’ll know she’s innocent.”
Tony let out a breath. “You’re right. But other than calling the police ourselves…which will just raise more questions, how do we do this? It needs to be someone else.”
Nina bit her lip in thought before going to a nearby cupboard to retrieve something. Passing him a balaclava, he shot her a bewildered look.
“We smash a couple of windows, figure out what’s going on, and buy her some time. We make sure a neighbour sees us, so they can call the cops. Then we just hope they catch this guy in the act.”
“What if we don’t get seen? Then it’s all for nothing.”
Taking in a breath, she met his honest eyes and nodded. “Then just one of us. The other goes to a payphone, calls the cops, and says they’re an innocent passerby witnessing a robbery. I don’t like splitting up, but it’s probably the only way to go.”
Tony nodded.
“Then let’s do it.”
He was supposed to be out by now.
She’d gone and called the cops. All Tony was supposed to do was make a bit of noise and commotion, give some evidence to support her claim, and then get back out and meet her at the car. But now she was worried. Nina knew splitting up was a bad idea, but she also knew how important Kim’s safety was to Tony. She understood that this was the final thing that might make him finally forgive himself for running away with her.
Nina made her way over to the house, putting on the second balaclava she’d brought in case of this exact situation. She snuck along the side walls towards the rear of the property. Although this actually helped substantiate her claim of burglars, if the cops came too quickly, they were screwed. She slipped in through the back door, cautiously peering around at the surroundings. Her breath hitched at the bloody, beaten body on the floor, which she presumed to be that of Gary’s wife.
“Tony?…” She whispered. All she could hear was some muffled yelling from upstairs. Worried, she drew her weapon.
Suddenly, there was a gunshot. Looking up at the source, Nina had to clasp her hand over her mouth to stop herself from screaming as she watched Tony fall to the ground. The man she presumed to be Gary Matheson stood over him, holding a pistol. She ducked behind the couch, feeling tears prick the back of her eyes.
“Kim, all you have to do is one thing for me.” The man called out. “You come out now, you give me Meghan, then I’ll let you run away, alright? Nobody else has to get hurt. I told you not to call the police. I told you to keep quiet, but you didn’t listen, did you?”
The sound of Gary’s footsteps disappeared as he walked around the corner of the upstairs hall. Desperately, she ran towards Tony’s body, no longer feeling the need to worry about her safety. If he was dead, what was the point? It would all be for nothing. Then she would be alone again, for good. Nobody could ever love her or understand her the way he did. Bending over him, she was confused at the lack of blood, wounds, or bruises. His eyes were shut, but he was warm and still breathing. He hadn’t stirred at her footsteps, to her worry.
An uncontrolled whimper left her mouth and she felt his hand bury itself through her short locks, pulling her mouth to his. She sighed into him as he kissed her.
“I’m okay.” He said, hushed. “Just had to play dead so he wouldn’t shoot me again.” Tony moved her hand to a puncture on his vest near his side. She must not have seen him put it on before they left. The discomfort in his face indicated that he might have gotten winded or cracked a rib. But still, he smiled against her, and she was reassured that he would be alright.
“Why did you get so close?” She whispered, feeling him brush a strand of hair from her face as he sat up.
This hadn’t been part of the plan. He was never supposed to get near this guy. She couldn't understand why he'd done something so risky.
“I-I had to know she was safe.” Tony mouthed, and she could see the concern on his face. She understood.
Helping him up, she let him lean his body weight on her as they moved down the stairs and out of the house. The police would be there any second now. When they got in the car and drove far enough away to avoid attracting attention, they quickly pushed the seats down. The windows were tinted, so they could keep an eye out safely. Before they could do so, Tony pulled Nina towards him, kissing her deeply, feeling relief course through both of them. They didn’t stop looking at each other, didn’t stop reassuring each other that they were okay, that they’d made it, that everything was going to work out.
When they heard police sirens moments later, they sighed collectively as they watched Gary Matheson get dragged out of the house in handcuffs, screaming wildly. Kim and the Mathesons’ daughter followed and were promptly led into an ambulance. It had all gone to plan. Nobody seemed to be berating Kim, the officers shoving Gary into the car seemed disgusted. Tuning into the frequency of the police comms on the handheld radio they'd brought, it seemed the police had found him impatiently busting down a door and holding his own daughter and a young woman at gunpoint. There would be an investigation. There would be serious consequences for the clerks who’d denied Kim’s requests.
And Tony felt the final piece of heaviness in his chest lift.
—
It had taken several hours to get ahold of Jack, what with him having ignored every phone call directed his way over the past six months. But seeing Kim’s caller ID changed that. She hadn’t spoken to him since the day she’d packed her bags and left their family home in California for good. They’d argued and she’d screamed about how much she was suffocating by living in the same house as him. So he’d let her go, and sat there broken-hearted ever since, believing she was better off without him. But the minute he’d heard the word ‘hospital’, he’d bolted to the airport, desperate to get on the first plane to the nearest province. Funnily enough, there’d been just one seat left on a flight that was supposed to depart within the hour. It had felt like fate, not that Jack believed in that sort of thing anymore, but he’d been pleased with being able to get there so quickly.
Bursting through the hospital doors, Jack desperately asked the receptionist which room Kim Bauer was in. When she did, he felt his heart thunder in his ears as he raced towards her. She looked up, surprised, as he opened the door.
He stopped, looking at her, seeing that she looked visibly fine. But he also took in her changed appearance after so many months apart. Kim seemed to have matured so much since he last saw her. Wordlessly, he moved closer, hugging her and kissing the top of her head.
“I’ve missed you so much, sweetheart.”
“Me too.” She whispered. “I’m so sorry, dad.”
“It’s alright, it’s alright. I’m just glad you’re safe.”
“I-I can’t believe it myself. The police didn’t believe me, I thought it was over.”
Jack pulled back, surprised.
She explained what had transpired over the past day, and he felt anger rise within him. Jack was furious at the man who’d nearly killed her, but also at himself for not being there in the first place. He pushed it all aside though. He simply appreciated that she was safe, that they were together, and that she would be coming back to California with him as soon as the hospital released her. She wasn't seriously hurt, mainly shaken, but Jack insisted on the nurse’s request to keep her there for observation.
But the mystery 911 caller baffled him. Just as the identity of the person who Gary had shot had baffled Kim. It wasn’t until he logged into his computer in the middle of the night, one of the very few possessions he’d had in his carry-on bag, that he figured it out. Initially, he had gone to the street camera footage of the street near the Mathesons’ home, finding two people in balaclavas running away from it. One seemed to be leaning on the other. The robbers hadn’t apparently taken anything, almost as though they were just a distraction, just seeking attention from passers-by. He paused it, and logged into the database of 911 calls, finding one from a payphone that lined up with the timeframe of the events.
“T-There’s a robbery. I see a man in a balaclava, and I can hear him breaking windows. I’m at the corner of…”
As soon as he played it, he knew he’d heard the voice before. Playing it again, just to prove that he wasn’t insane, his breath caught in his throat.
Frantically, he continued to play the footage of one of the street cams near the scene, desperate to see if he could confirm it with his eyes. And when he reached the end of the clip, finding the two robbers kissing in the safety of their car, with one suspiciously looking to be Nina’s height and build, with the other looking a lot like a certain accomplice of hers, someone he’d sworn he would shoot dead between the eyes for betraying him if he ever saw him again, Jack realised that maybe there had been more to the story than he realised.