I need my girl

"So, what's it going to be, Arman?" Kamdar asked him with a smirk. Maya continued to sob, her makeup running down her face and over the duct tape binding her mouth. Her hair was dripping with sweat. She was terrified.

While his line of work often made him able to look the other way about taking lives, even innocent ones, this time… he just couldn't. Enough was enough. He was tired of Kamdar's games. He was tired of putting his ass on the line, not for Kamdar, not for his wife, but for Thony.

He cared about her. He did. But he also knew that he had gone to great lengths for her, more than he would have for anyone. He had just killed that motel manager for no reason other than to protect her family. It was in cold blood. It had not just been a part of the job. He had shot an unarmed man because she had asked him to do it.

But now he was really in it.

Kamdar was testing his loyalty, which meant to Arman that Kamdar was suspicious and giving him one last chance to prove himself. God, this was a mess. No matter how much Kamdar apparently still cared for Nadia, he was not above killing her husband. Kamdar certainly wouldn't have an issue with getting Nadia all for himself. Maybe it was because Kamdar could see through him and knew he was not as faithful to Nadia as he claimed. Maybe Kamdar wasn't just testing Arman's loyalty to him but to Nadia, too.

And that made him pause.

Nadia, his wife who cared about him so much more than he deserved – although he didn't usually acknowledge that consciously, his ego always getting in the way. She had practically sold her soul going to Kamdar to get him out of prison, and he had repaid her by going off to do Thony's bidding again. He was an idiot. He didn't like being under Kamdar's control, and he had used that against her, but what choice did Nadia have? If he had stayed in prison any longer, he probably wouldn't be alive right now.

Arman acknowledged that Thony always seemed to attract risk for him, too. He had gotten out of prison only to put himself in just as much danger.

He couldn't go on like this anymore.

Nadia had made it perfectly clear to him that she couldn't, either. And how could he blame her? As much of an ass as he had been, making retorts about her and Kamdar being close… he had been unfaithful to her first. She was right about that. She was right about everything and always had his best interests at heart. But for some reason, when he looked at Thony, all of that went out the window, and he wished he could say it made him mad, but it didn't. He had let her walk all over him. He had let this happen.

But it would end tonight. It had to. It had gone on long enough.

"Your time is up, Arman," Kamdar said simply, his grin unnerving.

An idea came to Arman that soon formed into a strategy, a plan. While he certainly liked feeling more in control here, he hated that he would have to go to such an extreme to prove, not just to Nadia but to himself, where his loyalties really lied. However, Arman also recognised that if he didn't want to lose Nadia forever, then he had to do this.

"Arman," Thony beckoned from beside him, and he wasn't sure if it was a plea not to do it or an encouragement to hurry up and decide already.

It wouldn't be the first time Thony had sent him mixed signals. When she had called him for help with the motel manager, he had assumed it was her way of asking for him to be killed. Then, when he had shown up, she had acted horrified and made him feel like some kind of trigger-happy psycho, only for her to eventually decide that she indeed wanted him to kill the man.

Here, it was like she already believed he would be killing Maya, like, in her mind, he couldn't possibly even debate this decision. Sure, it would keep their cover intact, but it wasn't right. Thony had taken him for granted. She was treating him like her own personal hitman again. She didn't see it as a selfless act but rather an expectation of him. It was as if having him do just about anything to protect her and her family was the sole reason for his existence.

"One," Kamdar counted.

Thony looked more afraid as he continued to stand there silently. Maybe not as much as Maya, but afraid, nonetheless. He could understand that Maya and Thony had both gotten themselves in way over their heads. He did pity them. At the same time… Thony had chosen to involve herself this way. She had nearly gotten herself killed on multiple occasions, and anybody in their right mind would have known their limits and stopped. But not Thony. No, when it came to her son, everything and everyone around her was expendable.

Arman wasn't a parent; he couldn't entirely understand Thony's perspective. However, he did understand what it felt like to want to protect your loved ones with everything you had. As Arman came to terms with the situation in front of him, he realised there was only one person who truly mattered here and who he truly wanted to protect: Nadia. Thony had already wreaked so much havoc in their lives, and he couldn't take it anymore. He was done with all of this. Still, he wasn't about to cause unnecessary bloodshed. Maybe there was something he could do. Maybe it wasn't too late.

"No," Arman insisted, meeting Kamdar's eye again, but it was futile.

"Two…" Kamdar insisted, and Arman knew he was dead serious.

He was being a coward. That's what he was doing. A small part of him had just wanted to see if he could reason with Kamdar, but the man was nothing if not stubborn and paranoid about those in his inner circle. Arman couldn't keep beating around the bush; he needed to make a choice. He couldn't help but wonder, perhaps naively, whether the gun was even loaded, whether this was all just a test and no consequences would really come of firing. Arman wouldn't put it past Kamdar to do something like that – especially if Kamdar suspected Arman would try to shoot him. But he couldn't afford to make this assumption, and really, it didn't matter. His actions would speak of his character, so he needed to act accordingly.

Arman then realised It wasn't about choosing between Maya and Thony anymore. Rather, the choice was between Nadia and Thony. If he walked out of here with Thony, there would just be more lies to cover existing lies, and it would destroy everything. But if he gave Kamdar at least part of the truth, then maybe he would honour that and leave him and Nadia alone. There was not a lot of certainty either way, but if the latter gave him even a small chance of protecting Nadia, then he had to take it.

"Three!"

At that moment, Arman turned to his left and pulled the trigger without thinking. The bullet hit Thony's throat. Blood started to pour out of it, matching the red of her cocktail dress. There was a lot of it; he must have hit the carotid artery. He could have shot her in the forehead or the stomach, and he still would have broken her heart. Her eyes were wide, begging him to do something about it, but he wouldn't. He just watched Thony fall to the ground, his cheek twitching when she started to choke on her own blood as she tried to speak, but the only thing that left her mouth was more blood. It was a horrible sight, and all it did was exacerbate the sinking feeling in his gut, so he shot her again. He'd never expected to shoot Thony in his life, and he'd certainly never expected to shoot Thony twice, but he wanted to spare her any more unnecessary suffering. She didn't deserve that.

As he was feeling horrible about Thony, the thought of Luca pained him, too. God, the poor child had suffered so much, and now he would suffer even more because of him. Still, a part of him couldn't help but point out that the boy was better off without a parent so naive and eager to get involved in crime. It was Thony's karma, really, for her son to have to suffer. The son she had done everything for had now lost a big part of his life.

Even then, Arman recognised that he had had to make someone else suffer to alleviate his own. Killing Thony was a necessary action, but Luca was collateral he wasn't entirely okay with.

"Well, Arman, I can't say I expected that," Kamdar commented like it had been amusing to him. "You're full of surprises, aren't you?"

Arman swallowed the lump in his throat. "Thony was putting me and Nadia at risk, and I wouldn't have it. I'm done working for her."

As he said the words, he realised how true they were. No matter how sick to his stomach he felt seeing her lying there, bleeding out, he knew that it had been the right thing to do.

"What kind of risk are we talking about, Arman?" Kamdar asked with a slight sneer, but Arman could tell he was fishing for information, always so paranoid. "Surely, that's a drastic measure to take for silencing your mistress?"

"It wasn't like that," he was quick to defend.

If Kamdar really wanted this information, Arman could at least offer something to look cooperative, not too much, though, nothing that would make him risk finding out he had collaborated with the FBI. However, this particular detail also compromised Maya, so maybe he could get away with being vague.

"There's an FBI agent: Garrett Miller. He's been looking into me and probably you, too," Arman explained, omitting the part where Garrett had been about to arrest them both and only decided to let them go in exchange for their full collaboration in their quest to take down Kamdar. "Thony has a history of giving him intel for favours. Despite what you might think, she had no loyalty to me." That last part was true, at least.

Kamdar turned to Maya, who was suddenly trying to speak, her voice muffled by the duct tape. She had been crying the whole time, understandably, and the sounds she made resembled a plea. But now there was urgency in her eyes, and she sounded more like she was attempting to be coherent, putting together a sentence. For a moment, Kamdar looked at her, pondering whether she was annoying enough to just have her shot. Then, he decided to hear what she had to say – if only to satisfy his curiosity – by motioning with his head to one of his guards to remove the duct tape.

"If you make whatever you're about to say something worth my time, I just might spare you." He informed her, and unlike Arman, she seemed to believe him. "Talk, is he telling the truth?"

Maya took a shuddering breath, still shaking, but recognised this might be her only chance of getting out of this alive. Arman hated the hope he could see in her eyes. If there was one thing he knew about Kamdar, it was that people were disposable to him. He would do anything and everything to maintain the security of his lavish life and assets. But Maya probably didn't know that. She probably thought that a man so charming could never be so callous. "Garrett sent her to spy on me at The Clergy a while ago. She told me she was his informant-"

Kamdar smiled at her politely. "Thank you, dear. That's enough." He snapped his fingers and made a quick pointing motion with his fingers. The man who had had the gun pointed at Thony shot Maya in the forehead. Arman had still somewhat expected that, but it hurt to realise he hadn't even saved Maya. He hadn't done anything right lately – especially by Nadia – and all because of Thony. He was sure when he moved past the numbness, he would acknowledge the relief that she was gone.

"That was a mistake," Arman pointed out daringly, not entirely sure why he was criticising the man who had the power to choose whether he lived or died. "That FBI agent really cared about her."

"Our dear friend Agent Miller won't be a problem for much longer, either." Kamdar clasped his hands together, smiling like they had just finished a business meeting. "Well, off you go then, Arman," he said cheerily. "I've arranged for transport to take you home to your wife."

The little dig really made Arman want to punch Kamdar, but he held his tongue, gave Kamdar a curt nod, and walked out to the armoured car. The driver seemed to pay no attention to him, so Arman allowed the tears to silently roll down his face, fighting back the urge to sob about what he had just done. He hated how cathartic it had felt. He wasn't like this. But now he had the freedom he had sorely missed since Thony had become irrevocably involved in his life. From Hayak to Kamdar, they hadn't been able to relax. Nadia wanted their lives back, and so did he, and that was why he ultimately had done this.

Arman just hoped he would reap the reward soon enough. He could get Bosco to deliver some more meds so he could sell them to Robert's contacts. Soon enough, they would be not only free of debt but also free of all the people who had been trying to control their lives. They could move on then, finally buy the Habana off Isabel, leave their criminal past behind and finally go legit, as they'd dreamed for so long.

When he came home, he noticed the lights were on in the living room. Nadia was lying on the couch under a blanket. The TV was on a low volume. She was a light sleeper, so she stirred at the sound of him entering. At first, she scowled, clearly annoyed and confused by why he was here when she had made it very clear she wanted him out. But her expression soon softened when she noticed his tear-stained cheeks.

"What happened?"

He gulped. "I killed her. Thony. She's not a problem anymore."

Her eyes widened. "You what?"

Arman proceeded to explain what had happened in the warehouse, and it seemed his emotional state worried Nadia because she stood up and came over to him. Only then did he fall to his knees and break down in tears. He apologised over and over again to her, admitted how disgusted he felt for betraying her, and how tired he was of other people controlling their lives. To his immense gratitude, she held him and told him that she understood. He really didn't deserve her. But killing Thony had clearly been the extreme action he had needed to take to prove to her that he loved her. He just hated how far it had had to go and how he should have realised this a long time ago.

"Thank you," Nadia said, tilting his head up and swiping a tear from under his cheek. "I… I didn't want her to die, but it was the only way to cut ties permanently and stop her from making you risk everything. We… we've suffered enough because of her, Armando, and you did what you had to do to prevent it from going further."

He nodded. "I'm sorry," he croaked for the umpteenth time. "For everything."

"I know," she lamented. "Look, once we know we're in the clear, we'll…" She sighed. "We'll talk, and we'll make things right. We'll do it together, Armando. It'll be okay," Nadia assured, but Arman knew he would carry that guilt for the rest of his life.

However, the feeling of liberation within him, the knowledge that he and Nadia could not be entangled with Thony's messes any longer, would make it okay.

"I love you," he said, meeting her eyes.

She smiled a little. "I love you, too."