Rest, Reunion, Reconciliation

He still has his characteristic smug smile. The grin that could belong to none other than ‘Denny Crane’ himself. Alan was grateful he still looked like himself. It was killing him knowing that he was still far from what he was. But that was why he was here, in a hospital. That was why today was so important. Many had heard the rumours spread around the courthouse about the hypotheses of the true relationship between Alan Shore and Denny Crane. But few, very few, knew of its true nature. Quite simply, they loved each other. But their relationship was so much more than that. Despite their polarising opinions on some matters, they were twice as powerful when they worked together on the right ones.

“Listen, Alan. When I start to lose it. And I mean, really, lose it. You take me straight to that hospital, you understand?”

Alan let out a breath, watching the smoke of the cigar trail before him. “I don’t want to talk about this.”

He chuckled. “Nobody wants to talk about their death, Alan, but you can’t keep beating around the bush about it.”

“I don’t want to think about it, Denny. But I’ll humour you. What else do you want me to do when the time comes? The finances are sorted.”

Denny hummed in thought. “Make sure the nurse is hot. And make sure…that nobody else is there. I don’t want anybody to remember me as some lunatic. I want them to remember me as Denny Crane.”

Alan tipped his head forward.

“And after…I want you to leave my chair out on the balcony, just like this. And every night, I want you to leave out a cigar and a glass of scotch for me.”

“Like children do for Santa?”

Denny pointed at him. “Yes. Exactly. That way if they don’t let me in through the Pearly Gates, I can still come and haunt you.”

He snorted. 

His eyes widened. “And don’t you dare touch Shirley, she’s still mine.”

“She’s married to Carl, remember?”

“Still.”

“How are you feeling?” Alan asked, softly. The morphine was consuming him more and more by the minute.

He laughed, slightly giddily. “I’m fine.”

“A-are you sure you don’t want me to call anyone?”

Denny coughed a little. “No. I don’t want anybody else to see me like this.”

So Alan watched the drug slowly work through Denny’s body. Watched his muscles relax, watched a smile creep across his face as the warmth spread through his body. And eventually, Alan watched him shut his eyes, the heart rate monitor beside him gently flatlining after having spent the last few minutes slowly waning.

“Goodbye, Denny.” He whispered gently, kissing his hand, feeling the tears that had welled stream freely now.

—

It seemed every attorney, DA, and judge in Massachusetts had come out to Denny Crane’s memorial. And why wouldn’t they? He wasn’t just any old lawyer after all. In fact, Alan was sure even some old clients of Denny’s had showed up. He also found some semblance of humour in the way the attendees had congregated within their specific firms, almost like high school cliques. The judges huddled in one corner, looking so out of place without their robes, yet still familiar somehow. From a distance, he could see Cage and Fish. He hadn’t worked with them personally, but he knew that some of the cases even too outlandish for him had ended up there. Of course, Crane, Poole, and Schmidt, or rather, Chang, Poole, and Schmidt as it had been since the merger (although Denny had certainly continued to make his presence known there), were the centre of the attention, people constantly coming over to offer condolences. Tara unfortunately had been caught up in a blizzard in England and hadn’t made it in time, but she’d sent a whopping bouquet of flowers over anyway.

The eulogy was sweet, simple, and a little risqué, just how Denny would have wanted. But Alan felt somewhat foolish reading it. After all, the true words and feelings he had for Denny were to be spoken later, when he would visit the grave alone. After miraculously delivering his eulogy with dry eyes, Alan continued to survey the people around him. Edwin Poole almost looked like a lost puppy, pacing with an upset look on his face. Shirley was clutching Carl’s arm, no longer trying to suppress her tears at this point. Jerry had done so similarly to Katie, who’s pregnancy glow contrasted so strongly against the solemnness in the room. They were talking to Brad and Denise, still as close as before. He smirked at Sally, who’d since changed her appearance even further, having dyed her long hair a fiery red. She’d smirked back, but the grief was clear in her eyes.

But Alan ended up fixating on the group somewhere in the middle amongst the chaos. The group of people that once constituted the once incredibly prominent Donnell and Associates. Names had changed over the years, people had left. The firm of course had disbanded after Alan and Tara’s brief stay there. Something he’d always felt remorseful of. Because of his behaviour, his friendship with Ellenor, something he’d truly valued, had been lost.  To his surprise, when he made eye contact with her, she’d offered a commiserating smile. Even more surprising, she brushed past Jimmy and walked over.

He tried to think about what he’d heard about the others. Gamble, Dole, and Wyatt had become a civil firm. It was funny. He’d never met any of them, but all he knew was that the rumours spread around about Helen Gamble and Lindsay Dole were in the same vein as the ones spread around about him and Denny. Judging by the way Lindsay’s hand was wrapped neatly around Helen’s, Alan supposed that rumour was true too. Much to his relief, Eugene Young was nowhere to be seen. Out of all the lawyers who’d been there, he’d seemed the most angry. And while Alan Shore certainly enjoyed friendly banter, he also wasn’t an idiot. The pro-bono firm established by Stringer, Berluti, and Washington was still going strong, last he’d heard. Good for them, he supposed. Even the legendary Bobby Donnell, now sporting a salt-and-pepper beard, had somewhat resurfaced in the last few years. After several years spent travelling alone, it’d seemed he’d gotten his life back, now taking on a few cases every now and then for the hell of it. But he honestly didn’t know what Ellenor had done since then. And for that, he felt worse.

“Alan…” She said, gently, pulling him into a hug. What was it with the surprises today?

His throat cleared audibly. “Ellenor…how….how are you?”

She nodded slowly. “I’m alright…how are you holding up? I know you and Denny were close, I’m so sorry.”

He pressed his lips into a thin line, the hint of a bittersweet smile showing. “Thank you. I’m doing as well as I can be right now, I guess. How’s Zoe? God, she’d be…”

Ellenor fished her phone out, flashing the lock screen to Alan. The faint smile on his mouth widened at the photo. She was far from the cheery preschool aged child he’d last seen. “Just gone off to college. Mechanical engineering at MIT.” She let out a weak laugh. “No idea where she got that from.”

“I’m glad to hear. What about you? I’m surprised I haven’t even seen you in court all these years.” He shook his head in confusion.

“Oh, right. I ended up taking some time away from work, wanted to give my all to her. Now I just help out the others when I feel like it. I lecture at the legal school too, sometimes.”

Alan nodded agin. “Look…about….about what I did.”

“It was over a decade ago-“ She shrugged.

“N-no. I need to say this. You gave me a job at your firm, and I didn’t take it seriously. A legal firm is a working system, with many working parts. I was selfish. I walked in there as if I owned the place. I destroyed its legacy and worse, I destroyed our friendship. And for that, I’m truly sorry.”

She tilted her head sympathetically. “Truth be told, the disbandment gave us a fresh start we all needed. Everyone’s gone off and made their own firms focusing on the cases they want to take. And even when you showed up at Eugene’s first trial, it made him realise  that you wouldn’t be the only lawyer in Boston to flaunt your personal connection.”

“I was going to say, I haven’t seen him around today?”

“He’s worked his way up to the Supreme Court now, after moving interstate.” Ellenor seemed proud of him. “Look the point is…it made us realise that we needed to move on, probably not the best way to do it, but I forgive you. I’m willing to let bygones be bygones.”

“Thank you…” He said, softly. “You’ve no idea how much that means to me. I’ve missed having you around.”

“Of course, I’ve missed you too.” She hugged him again. “I know your firm is probably doing something after this, but do you want to catch up for coffee some time next week? I think Zoe’s going on break soon, I’m sure she’d want to join us.”

 “I’d love to.”